It's All My Husband's Fault

  The Ex and Ned officially got married the day before Easter.   Daughter had been talking about it for a couple of weeks, saying lots of not-so-nice things.  She's come straight out before and said she didn't think the two of them should be getting married.  Early last week, Daughter commented to nobody in particular that The Ex and Ned needed couples therapy before they got married and then added, "And Mom( The Ex ) needs therapy by herself." ( Daughter isn't even 17 yet.  She recognizes the immaturity that her mother's relationship is built on and can identify her mom's mental/emotional instability.  Honestly, it's like she got none of The Ex's genes whatsoever. )  Daughter asked me "what would happen" if she stood up when they were asked if anyone objected to the wedding.  I told Daughter not to do that.  Daughter asked if it really would do anything or if it was just something they asked at weddings.  I said objecting would ...

  So apparently, this investigation into The Ex and/or Ned started when Daughter was on spring break and was at their house.  A social worker and a police officer came to the house and spoke to Ned.  Allegedly, he offered to let them speak to Daughter but they declined...only to contact our county three weeks later and ask them to speak to Daughter, which doesn't make any sense but whatever.   Since Daughter talked to the social worker, I've learned quite a few things.  The Ex admitted  out loud that the investigation was happening because of "a little bruise that [Lucifer] got from a spanking" and accused Ned's ex-wife of "pushing on it" to make it look worse than it was. ( So she basically admitted that not only do she and/or Ned spank Lucifer, but one of them hit him hard enough to leave a bruise.  I don't know what your thoughts on spanking are, but there should never be a bruise on a child as a result of having their butt smacked.  Ever . )...

  This is quite possibly my longest blog post yet, so grab some popcorn and buckle up for the ride.   Ned's ex-wife is claiming that Ned and The Ex are abusing Lucifer.  I found out that this complaint had been made a few weeks ago; Daughter knew about it but didn't tell us.  I can't say I blame her, as I'm sure The Ex instructed/threatened her not to say anything about it.   Daughter said that Lucifer's mom allegedly found a bruise on his butt and she's saying a bunch of other stuff has happened.  Daughter doesn't believe it.  I don't believe Ned is abusing Lucifer, but The Ex?  Well...I don't want to say that she is , but I also don't want to say that she isn't .  I know how she's treated her two oldest children their entire lives, so I can't say I'd definitely rule out her putting her hands on yet another child.   Apparently, Lucifer was interviewed at school without a parent or guardian present.  I heard that The Ex want...

  Husband just messaged me on his break.   He got a voice mail from a Human Services worker in our county.  She said she was requested by The Ex's county to speak with Daughter "regarding some incidences that have occurred in her mother's home."   I did call and speak with the worker; she said Daughter isn't being named as a victim, but since she's part of the household up there, they want to speak to her.   Honestly...how much shit can you put your kids through before the state realizes that you suck as a parent?

  Last weekend, Daughter and I were talking about having your period.  I'm not positive how we got on the topic, but that's irrelevant.  In the middle of us talking, Daughter said that The Ex "doesn't like her using tampons."  I asked why.  Daughter said, "I don't know.  She says, 'I was 18 before I used tampons.  I always used pads."  My mouth got ahead of my brain and I blurted out, "Yeah, well she also had a kid at 18, so..."  I immediately apologized for it; Daughter couldn't stop laughing.   Later that same day, Daughter got a phone call from The Ex's younger daughter.  She asked if Daughter knew where Son's baby book was.  Daughter said no, she didn't.  Her sister said that The Ex said they had the baby book for Son & Girlfriend's baby shower, but now they can't find it.  ( I've got so many questions and comments about this.  First, why is a 10-year-old asking where her brother's baby book is?...

  Son and Girlfriend came to visit for the weekend.  I spent most of the time holding my grandson because he is honestly just one of the sweetest things I've ever laid eyes on.  Seriously you guys, I want so badly to share pictures of him with all of you because he's just gorgeous but, you know...anonymity and all that mess.   Back when we were all at the hospital and Girlfriend was in labor, Husband had said half-jokingly that The Ex wouldn't come in the hospital room if he and I were in there; Girlfriend agreed and said that The Ex "is very immature." ( This was the first time I had heard Girlfriend say something negative about The Ex.  Her dad already told us how he felt, but to hear it directly from her was pretty interesting. ) I shrugged and told Girlfriend that we weren't there for The Ex; we were there for her, Son, and their baby.   Friday night, Husband and Girlfriend were going through some old pictures of Son and Daughter when they were youn...

  Husband's and/or my interactions with Ned have been extremely limited and short.  We've never really talked to him about much so we've never really gotten to know him.  Most of what we know about Ned is whatever Daughter tells us.   Daughter hasn't kept it a secret that she doesn't like Ned, she doesn't consider Ned to be her parent, and that she doesn't think that The Ex should be with Ned.  Have you ever seen that e-card that says, "Once you hate someone, everything they do is offensive.  'Look at this bitch eating those crackers like she owns the place.'"?  I feel like that's the level that Daughter is on with Ned.  While I don't think it was right for him to make fat jokes about her, I wonder if he truly just clueless and didn't understand how that would be offensive.   The day that our grandson was born, we spent quite a few hours with/around Ned.  He was....very nice, actually.  He initiated conversation with Husband...

  If you've just started reading, or perhaps those of you who read it but forgot, I blogged years ago about how money is always the driving factor with The Ex. You can read all about it here .  Also, keep in mind that blog post was over five years ago so countless things have happened since then which haven't been summarily documented in the same manner.   Earlier this week, Daughter commented about going in for a dental exam and asked about getting her wisdom teeth removed.  I told her I didn't know what to say about that because Husband had repeatedly asked The Ex when she would have her half of the money to get Son's removed when he was still at home with us; I told Daughter that The Ex would read the messages and ignore Husband.  ( Knowing how she tried to weasel out of paying $14.80 for basketball shoes on the basis that she "never agreed to it," I have no doubt she would have fought tooth and nail over having to pay back almost $500 for one bill ...