It's All My Husband's Fault

  After learning that The Ex had a texting number on Friday, Husband sent her a text on Sunday asking if they could switch weekends in December.  The Ex didn't respond.   On Monday afternoon, The Ex's mom left Husband a message saying, "[The Ex's] sister-in-law called me.  She didn't feel like calling you, so I'm calling you. ( Why would either of you call Husband? )"  The Ex's mom goes on about how The Ex wants to know if she's picking the kids up on Tuesday or not until Wednesday for Thanksgiving, and asks Husband to call her.   Husband was at the dentist with Son and Daughter, went grocery shopping afterward and remembered as we were sitting down to eat that The Ex's mom had tried calling him.  Husband sent The Ex's mom a text saying that he had texted The Ex the night before and had emailed her that day.   Apparently, The Ex's mom did not get this text so she called Husband again.  We were eating dinner, so Husband obviously d...

  The Friday before Thanksgiving, Husband gets out of work, turns on his phone and has a text message from an unknown number saying the open wi-fi at the house has been locked, their computer is broken and they don't know who can look at it for free, and any emails since the last one they sent to Husband haven't been read.  Then they say they want to know if they can pick up the kids early on Tuesday.   Husband texts back later that day and asks who it is. ( We've both had the same phone numbers for 10+ years but we still get "wrong number" texts )  The person texts back: "It's [The Ex]." ( ?? )  Husband asks when she got a new number; The Ex says she didn't get a new number, this number is for texting only, someone found it for her for free.  The Ex goes on to complain about how they sometimes get messages hours late or even the next day, sometimes they don't get the whole message if it's long.  "Not reliable but all I have" ...

  Let's skip back one day.  The night before Son hurt himself, The Ex left Husband a message at almost 9pm saying that her dad was picking up the kids for her that Friday ( Because she is just sooo busy working part-time, she can't possibly come to get her own kids )  The Ex says that her dad wants to know if he can pick up the kids "a little bit earlier" and says a little bit means "a half hour, if not an hour earlier" ( Not what I would consider "a little bit" but okay. )  Husband didn't get time to call The Ex back, figured he would text or email her the next day.   Then Son got hurt, we went to the hospital and The Ex's parent's drove down.  As we're standing outside of the hospital, The Ex's dad brings up picking up the kids early on Friday.  Husband tells him he's not sure if that will work, he likes to say goodbye to them before they leave.  I say to The Ex's dad also that Husband works until 4pm and then has to...

  One day, I get a call from Son's cell phone while he's at school.  It's the principal, who says Son hurt himself and I might want to come look at it.  I drive down to the school, the secretary lets me in and says, "Yeah, he definitely needs stitches."  I ask what happened; Son says he tried jumping over a leaf pile, caught his foot in a wagon handle and landed on his face instead of his feet.   I leave the school with him, trying to plan what to do with Baby Boy while I'm dealing with this; Son is trying to call The Ex.  The Ex is not answering.  I call The Ex, who still doesn't answer; I leave her a message saying that Son hurt himself, I'm taking him to urgent care and he's probably going to need stitches and she can call me if she has questions.   The Ex calls Son ( Heaven forbid she speak to me ), hasn't even listened to my message.  Son tells her he broke his chin open and needs stitches.  The Ex asks if we're at the doctor; S...

  The kids asked me on a Monday if they were here for the following weekend or with The Ex.  I said they were with The Ex, because she and Husband had switched weekends for the dance. ( Remember that whole ordeal?  We switched weekends and then lost one of our days for the birthday party which The Ex intentionally switched trying to make things difficult?  The following weekend was the weekend they had switched for )   The kids said something about The Ex may not come to get them and if she didn't come, then she wanted a different weekend. ( ...what? )  I told the kids that wasn't how placement worked; their mom got them certain days and their dad got them certain days.  If their mom chose not to take them on her days, then that's all there was to it.  A few days later, we found out that The Ex told someone that she wasn't going to have the kids the following weekend, but then said she might have them ( Okay, I see where this is going. ...

  I'm sure that for some people, mediation works great.  However, when you are dealing with a narcissist who only cares about what works best for herself, then mediation is not going to work.  Husband and The Ex had been to mediation twice before; it did nothing for them.  Despite this, the court still refers them to mediation because...well, I don't know why.  I guess they hope that maybe - just maybe - the two of them can agree on something and not waste the court's time.  Unfortunately, The Ex wants everything done her way; if it's not done that way, we end up in court.   Husband and The Ex had mediation in September.  As soon as it started, The Ex began complaining about e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g.  The Ex can't afford this, The Ex can't pay for that, The Ex doesn't agree to this, blah blah blah.  Husband looked at her and said, "Why do you keep saying 'I'?  We're supposed to be talking about the kids, not you." ( Burn . )  The ...

  The kids came home from school, said there was a dance in School City the next week and that they wanted to go with their friends.  We told them that weekend was The Ex's weekend but we'd email her and see.  Husband sent an email that Friday night, saying that the dance was next Saturday and both kids wanted to go.  Husband asked if they kids could stay for the dance, or if The Ex would bring them to it.   Sunday afternoon, The Ex calls Son and says she got Husband's email about the dance but she has to say no.  Son starts whining ( Literally, whining ) saying he wants to go.  The Ex says they're having her son's birthday party on Saturday so they can't do both things; The Ex then starts playing mind games and tells Son that Husband shouldn't be talking to Son about this without talking to her first ( What?  You'd rather that Husband ask you if the kids can go, wait for your answer, and THEN ask the kids if they even want to go in the first pl...