Time is a-ticking
About two weeks ago, I had what I like to refer to as my best idea in the history of ever. I don't even remember what brought it about but I was thinking about child support, how The Ex always blames her child support obligation for the reason she's broke, how Son is convinced we're just taking all of her money, blah blah blah. I wondered if there was a way that we could get by without child support - after all, we had already gone a month and a half without a payment.
Then, all at once, every single gear in my brain started spinning.
I told Husband about my idea. He said it seemed pretty good. I called Our Attorney; she said it sounded good and if we got The Ex to agree to it, then even better.
I typed up a stipulation and Husband sent it to The Ex via 2houses. To summarize, we'd change the order to say that beginning on July 1st:
• The Ex will not have to pay any child support
• The Ex will provide all transportation for the kids to and from the placement exchanges.
• Husband will get to claim both kids on our tax return
• Husband will be 100% responsible for the kids' variable expenses.
If she signs, everybody wins. In fact, we're ahead if she doesn't sign it because she can't lie to the kids and tell them that we're taking all of her money or that money is all we care about because we offered to let her not pay anything and she refused to go with it.
So Husband sent it to her and waited. And waited. And waited.
Yesterday, he sent a message asking what she thought of it; said he had sent it over a week ago and asked her to please let him know what she thought. When he went to exchange the kids, The Ex was again driving her parents' car. Husband asked the kids where her two vehicles were; the kids said something along the lines of, "She's not driving them right now." (The only thing I can assume from this is that The Ex is so far behind in payments on both vehicles that she doesn't want to risk driving them to work and having them repossessed, so she's hiding them at her parents' house until she can figure out how she's going to fix the situation.)
After the kids got into her car, The Ex came over to talk to Husband about the stipulation. She asked what it meant when it said that her child support obligation would be "suspended and held open." (Because, you know, don't ask your lawyer these questions. Ask your ex-husband.) Husband says it means she won't pay child support. The Ex starts rambling on about how some people are telling her it's a good idea to sign it, some people are telling her it's a bad idea. The Ex says she had a friend of hers help her look at it. (This same friend is not allowed to be employed or even volunteer where she will be in a position to handle cash, checks, bank accounts, etc., because she is a convicted felon for stealing from her former employer. This is the type of person that The Ex calls her friend.) The Ex then says, "Money's not a problem..." (Right, that's why you always tell the kids that you have no money because you pay child support and that Husband is just trying to take all of your money because that's all he cares about. That must also be why you're $500+ in arrears for variable and medical expenses, because money's not a problem, right?) Then she says that she doesn't want Husband to take her back to court and try to take the kids away from her by saying that she's not paying child support. (She is literally this stupid. She thinks Husband can agree to suspend her child support, and then try to get her placement reduced or terminated on the grounds that she's not paying child support. If placement was tied into child support, then she wouldn't have had the kids at all for the last seven weeks. She is so incredibly dense.) Husband tells her that it doesn't work like that. She says that she'll let him know. Husband asks if she'll let him know that night. She says, "Tonight?" Husband asks her how long ago he sent the stipulation to her; she stares at him blankly and says nothing. (Ten days. He had sent it ten days prior to her initiating this particular conversation and she still hadn't given him an answer.) That was pretty much the end of the conversation.
So for whatever reason, it appears that The Ex is discussing this stipulation with everyone on the face of this earth except for the two people that she needs to discuss it with: her lawyer and Husband. My guess is she owes her lawyer a crap-ton of money and doesn't want to keep adding on to the bill, or her lawyer just won't take her calls anymore.
As we close on this blog post, this is now the eleventh day since sending the stipulation to The Ex. She still has said nothing, hasn't logged in to the site, hasn't responded to any messages. Because that little thing called "court order" only applies how and when she wants it to.
Then, all at once, every single gear in my brain started spinning.
I told Husband about my idea. He said it seemed pretty good. I called Our Attorney; she said it sounded good and if we got The Ex to agree to it, then even better.
I typed up a stipulation and Husband sent it to The Ex via 2houses. To summarize, we'd change the order to say that beginning on July 1st:
• The Ex will not have to pay any child support
• The Ex will provide all transportation for the kids to and from the placement exchanges.
• Husband will get to claim both kids on our tax return
• Husband will be 100% responsible for the kids' variable expenses.
If she signs, everybody wins. In fact, we're ahead if she doesn't sign it because she can't lie to the kids and tell them that we're taking all of her money or that money is all we care about because we offered to let her not pay anything and she refused to go with it.
So Husband sent it to her and waited. And waited. And waited.
Yesterday, he sent a message asking what she thought of it; said he had sent it over a week ago and asked her to please let him know what she thought. When he went to exchange the kids, The Ex was again driving her parents' car. Husband asked the kids where her two vehicles were; the kids said something along the lines of, "She's not driving them right now." (The only thing I can assume from this is that The Ex is so far behind in payments on both vehicles that she doesn't want to risk driving them to work and having them repossessed, so she's hiding them at her parents' house until she can figure out how she's going to fix the situation.)
After the kids got into her car, The Ex came over to talk to Husband about the stipulation. She asked what it meant when it said that her child support obligation would be "suspended and held open." (Because, you know, don't ask your lawyer these questions. Ask your ex-husband.) Husband says it means she won't pay child support. The Ex starts rambling on about how some people are telling her it's a good idea to sign it, some people are telling her it's a bad idea. The Ex says she had a friend of hers help her look at it. (This same friend is not allowed to be employed or even volunteer where she will be in a position to handle cash, checks, bank accounts, etc., because she is a convicted felon for stealing from her former employer. This is the type of person that The Ex calls her friend.) The Ex then says, "Money's not a problem..." (Right, that's why you always tell the kids that you have no money because you pay child support and that Husband is just trying to take all of your money because that's all he cares about. That must also be why you're $500+ in arrears for variable and medical expenses, because money's not a problem, right?) Then she says that she doesn't want Husband to take her back to court and try to take the kids away from her by saying that she's not paying child support. (She is literally this stupid. She thinks Husband can agree to suspend her child support, and then try to get her placement reduced or terminated on the grounds that she's not paying child support. If placement was tied into child support, then she wouldn't have had the kids at all for the last seven weeks. She is so incredibly dense.) Husband tells her that it doesn't work like that. She says that she'll let him know. Husband asks if she'll let him know that night. She says, "Tonight?" Husband asks her how long ago he sent the stipulation to her; she stares at him blankly and says nothing. (Ten days. He had sent it ten days prior to her initiating this particular conversation and she still hadn't given him an answer.) That was pretty much the end of the conversation.
So for whatever reason, it appears that The Ex is discussing this stipulation with everyone on the face of this earth except for the two people that she needs to discuss it with: her lawyer and Husband. My guess is she owes her lawyer a crap-ton of money and doesn't want to keep adding on to the bill, or her lawyer just won't take her calls anymore.
As we close on this blog post, this is now the eleventh day since sending the stipulation to The Ex. She still has said nothing, hasn't logged in to the site, hasn't responded to any messages. Because that little thing called "court order" only applies how and when she wants it to.
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