So many words and nothing gets said.
Last Saturday, Husband sent a message to The Ex outlining what the weekend placement would be if they switched weekends for Daughter's volleyball tournament toward the end of this month. On Tuesday, Daughter's coaches announced there would be another tournament this weekend; they told Daughter she didn't have to attend all of the games but they would like her there for at least the first one. Daughter said that she wanted to go to the game but also wanted to go to her brother's (The Ex's son with Boyfriend) birthday party, and said that either The Ex or her dad could pick her up after the first game and they'd still get back in time for the party. Husband sent The Ex a message and explained all of this, asking her to let him know if she could work something out.
Yesterday, The Ex replied to the newest message at 7:30pm:
"I'm very sorry to have to say that if [Daughter] has a game this weekend, she'll have to stay the weekend with you. (...okay, so because I asked you if you could pick her up in the morning you just forfeit the whole weekend? Because you "want to spend more time with them"?) We are having a birthday party for [her son's name] that (*this) weekend and I would have to ask Dad if he'll want to drive over there on Saturday. (1) I don't care about your weekend plans, and 2) I'm pretty damn sure you could have called your dad immediately, posed the question, and then had an actual answer instead of your "I don't know anything" bullsh*t that you opt to default to on a regular basis.) Is there any way she can miss this one game? (She just said she was leaving Daughter here; then she said she'd see if her dad could pick up Daughter; now she wants to know if Daughter can miss the "game" after being specifically told it is a tournament and Daughter will be missing multiple games.) I'll have to talk with her also. (Why? Daughter is part of a team, the team asked her to be there. There's nothing to talk about. Despite saying this, she didn't bother calling or texting Daughter about it; she'll just show up and try to guilt Daughter into leaving tonight so she won't have to make an extra trip, because Heaven forbid that she should sacrifice anything for her children at any given time.) I'll let you know when I pick up tomorrow. (This is going to be great, because Husband isn't going to be home - I'M going to be home and The Ex never wants to talk to me.)
By the way, I don't think you ever sent me a schedule for [Son] and his football. (You're right. The coach never handed one out. I sent you exactly what I was given, which was nothing.) Am I picking up at your house??? (First, why wouldn't you be picking up at our house? Every single exchange has taken place at our house since July; nobody said anything different. Second, what does exchange location have to do with Son's football schedule? Is she thinking there's a football game that we're "hiding" from her?)"
Husband replied to this message and told her that the coach never gave us a schedule so we have nothing to send to her; he said Son had football practice until about 6pm so she could pick up at our house but it would be later because of practice. Husband said that Daughter would already be missing at least two games this Saturday, that's why the coaches asked her to come to the first game. Husband said Daughter wanted to go to both the game and her brother's birthday party afterward. Husband asked The Ex to let him know what she was doing so he can tell the coaches if Daughter will be there or not.
At 7:41pm, The Ex replied to the message about switching weekends:
"I've read your message. (You sure have. That's why there's a check mark indicating it's read; you don't need to tell me that you read the message because I can see it.) Before I agree, I need to ask Dad for help. (....again, this could be done in a 5-minute phone call to her father. Instead, let's reply about all of the things that we NEED to do but haven't done yet.) Every other weekend I don't have [Son and Daughter], [names of her and Boyfriend's kids] are with there Dad. (*their. And "dad" doesn't need to be capitalized because you're not using a person's name.) I pick up every other Sunday. (Ahh yes, because you're on your second divorce/custody case in a decade. Nice work.) I would need drivers for those weekends. (This has absolutely no effect on me or anyone else in my household.) Especially on Sundays. (...YEAH.) I'll let you know soon. (She was told about this on September 22nd. We still don't have an answer.)
Husband replied and told her that it's fine if she doesn't want to switch but Daughter needs to be at her tournament on the 24th and back here by 11am on the 25th. If she can get Daughter to the events on time, then we'd leave the schedule as it is; if she can't, he's willing to switch weekends so she can spend time with both of the kids instead of just Son, and said it was up to her.
My favorite part of these messages is that she typed allll of that, and we still don't know what's going on. She sent not one, but two messages, yet we still don't have any more information than we did before she replied. She types like she talks: lots and lots and lots of words that mean absolutely nothing whatsoever.
Yesterday, The Ex replied to the newest message at 7:30pm:
"I'm very sorry to have to say that if [Daughter] has a game this weekend, she'll have to stay the weekend with you. (...okay, so because I asked you if you could pick her up in the morning you just forfeit the whole weekend? Because you "want to spend more time with them"?) We are having a birthday party for [her son's name] that (*this) weekend and I would have to ask Dad if he'll want to drive over there on Saturday. (1) I don't care about your weekend plans, and 2) I'm pretty damn sure you could have called your dad immediately, posed the question, and then had an actual answer instead of your "I don't know anything" bullsh*t that you opt to default to on a regular basis.) Is there any way she can miss this one game? (She just said she was leaving Daughter here; then she said she'd see if her dad could pick up Daughter; now she wants to know if Daughter can miss the "game" after being specifically told it is a tournament and Daughter will be missing multiple games.) I'll have to talk with her also. (Why? Daughter is part of a team, the team asked her to be there. There's nothing to talk about. Despite saying this, she didn't bother calling or texting Daughter about it; she'll just show up and try to guilt Daughter into leaving tonight so she won't have to make an extra trip, because Heaven forbid that she should sacrifice anything for her children at any given time.) I'll let you know when I pick up tomorrow. (This is going to be great, because Husband isn't going to be home - I'M going to be home and The Ex never wants to talk to me.)
By the way, I don't think you ever sent me a schedule for [Son] and his football. (You're right. The coach never handed one out. I sent you exactly what I was given, which was nothing.) Am I picking up at your house??? (First, why wouldn't you be picking up at our house? Every single exchange has taken place at our house since July; nobody said anything different. Second, what does exchange location have to do with Son's football schedule? Is she thinking there's a football game that we're "hiding" from her?)"
Husband replied to this message and told her that the coach never gave us a schedule so we have nothing to send to her; he said Son had football practice until about 6pm so she could pick up at our house but it would be later because of practice. Husband said that Daughter would already be missing at least two games this Saturday, that's why the coaches asked her to come to the first game. Husband said Daughter wanted to go to both the game and her brother's birthday party afterward. Husband asked The Ex to let him know what she was doing so he can tell the coaches if Daughter will be there or not.
At 7:41pm, The Ex replied to the message about switching weekends:
"I've read your message. (You sure have. That's why there's a check mark indicating it's read; you don't need to tell me that you read the message because I can see it.) Before I agree, I need to ask Dad for help. (....again, this could be done in a 5-minute phone call to her father. Instead, let's reply about all of the things that we NEED to do but haven't done yet.) Every other weekend I don't have [Son and Daughter], [names of her and Boyfriend's kids] are with there Dad. (*their. And "dad" doesn't need to be capitalized because you're not using a person's name.) I pick up every other Sunday. (Ahh yes, because you're on your second divorce/custody case in a decade. Nice work.) I would need drivers for those weekends. (This has absolutely no effect on me or anyone else in my household.) Especially on Sundays. (...YEAH.) I'll let you know soon. (She was told about this on September 22nd. We still don't have an answer.)
Husband replied and told her that it's fine if she doesn't want to switch but Daughter needs to be at her tournament on the 24th and back here by 11am on the 25th. If she can get Daughter to the events on time, then we'd leave the schedule as it is; if she can't, he's willing to switch weekends so she can spend time with both of the kids instead of just Son, and said it was up to her.
My favorite part of these messages is that she typed allll of that, and we still don't know what's going on. She sent not one, but two messages, yet we still don't have any more information than we did before she replied. She types like she talks: lots and lots and lots of words that mean absolutely nothing whatsoever.
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