"...you can meet them there"
Years ago, Husband and I established a rule if something was checked out from the library by us, those items were not to be taken to The Ex's house because if they were forgotten, we'd run into a problem. If we lived in the same city as The Ex, or even relatively close by, then it wouldn't be an issue. However, when The Ex keeps increasing the distance between our houses it's easier on everyone if we simply keep here what belongs here, particularly when it's not even ours to begin with.
Let's go back to this past fall. Son asked The Ex if she, her parents, and her brother would collectively buy him an Xbox One for Christmas. They did this but apparently didn't buy him any games. (I say this because we have an Xbox 360. Son specifically asked for an Xbox One game for Christmas. I asked if that game would work on the 360; he said no. I told him I didn't understand why he was asking for a game he couldn't play; he stopped talking about it.)
Now let's go from the fall to a just a few weeks ago. Without telling us, Son rented an Xbox One game from the library and took it to The Ex's house when he got picked up on Friday. (Initially I was upset by this because what the hell? This is a rule; Son knows it's a rule. Son blatantly disobeyed what we told him not to do. But the more I thought about it, I had to be honest - at 15 years old, I didn't always do what my parents wanted me to do. If the worst thing he's doing is taking library items, we're not that bad off compared to what other parents are going through.) That Sunday, Son forgot to bring the game home. This might not have been such a problem, but the way that the placement schedule worked out, The Ex wasn't going to pick them up for another 3 weeks.
Son continued to forget about all of this until he got a late notice from the library in the mail. We asked where the game was. Son admitted it was at The Ex's, said he'd have to remember it the next time he went there.
Son came back from The Ex's and the very next day, got his second late notice indicating that the cost of the game was $54; if the game was not returned, it would need to be purchased because the library would have to replace what they were going to consider a lost item. Son says he forgot the game, it's at The Ex's parents' house, and asks if we can call them and ask them to mail it back. Husband says he will send The Ex a message about it.
Husband logs into 2houses and sends The Ex a message with the subject "[Name of game] XBox One game" (Keep that in mind because it's important later.) Husband said that Son took a library game that he thinks was left at The Ex's parents' house and it's been forgotten twice now, so Son is getting late notices for it. Husband asked if either The Ex or her parents could mail back the game; he also mentions that we're missing another library item and asks that if it's found at either her parents' house or at Ned's, if it could be mailed back with the game.
One hour and twenty-two minutes later:
"I'm sorry he brought games and or movies. (We stated that Son took one game and we're missing a movie. How does that translate to "games and or movies"?) Especially if there (*they're) library ones. (...it was very clearly stated that both missing items are library items. We have literally never once asked her to return something that we personally purchased for Son or Daughter because unlike her, when we purchase things for the kids to use we don't mind if it goes back and forth between houses.) I haven't seen him with anything here. (Probably because when Son took it with him, he didn't spend the weekend with you. Not to mention that we specifically stated that Son believes the game is at your parents' house.) I'll ask [The Ex's brother] and mom tomorrow about them. [Name of movie] is a movie? (This was our fault. We didn't explain that it was a movie because past experience has shown that too much information overloads her pea-sized brain.) And I'm assuming the game is a regular xbox or xbox one? (The subject of the message she is replying to is, "[Name of game] XBox One game" which we felt was self-explanatory. Instead, The Ex is assuming it "is a regular xbox or xbox one?" I don't even know what that means...is she stating her assumption or asking a question?) Or what kind of game is it? (.......she cannot be serious.)
I'll also ask if anyone is driving to [Hometown] anytime soon and you can meet them there (...I beg your pardon? Hometown is a 40+ minute one-way trip from our house; at what point did Husband ever volunteer to do this? All I can assume is this is her, once again, trying to control the situation so she's going to tell Husband how we can get these items back.)"
Husband replied ten minutes later saying he didn't know when he was going to Hometown next and it would be a lot faster for her to mail it back. He clarified the game was an XBox One game and the movie was a movie. Husband asked again for both items to be mailed back as soon as they were located.
The Ex read the message less than 24 hours after Husband sent it. The next day she called Daughter about it, saying they didn't know where the game was and talked about which items were/weren't overdue yet. The following day, which was three days after Husband first asked her to return the game:
"The game was found at moms. (Great. Thanks for paying attention when I told you where to find it.) I called the library by you and she suggested I hand it in to the library over here, and they would send it to [Our City]. (What's astounding to me is that she can never get any information about the kids' school activities or events on her own, so if she doesn't attend then it's Husband's fault. Yet she located the number for the library in Our City, called them, discussed both missing items, and was able to come to a resolution on how to get the game returned.) No one found [name of movie] movie."
Husband replied that if The Ex's library will return the game to our library, it's fine; he just wants it back ASAP because Son is getting charged for each day that it's late. The Ex read it and said nothing.
So yeah, really hoping that game shows up otherwise Son is going to owe the library $54. Thanks, Mommy.
Let's go back to this past fall. Son asked The Ex if she, her parents, and her brother would collectively buy him an Xbox One for Christmas. They did this but apparently didn't buy him any games. (I say this because we have an Xbox 360. Son specifically asked for an Xbox One game for Christmas. I asked if that game would work on the 360; he said no. I told him I didn't understand why he was asking for a game he couldn't play; he stopped talking about it.)
Now let's go from the fall to a just a few weeks ago. Without telling us, Son rented an Xbox One game from the library and took it to The Ex's house when he got picked up on Friday. (Initially I was upset by this because what the hell? This is a rule; Son knows it's a rule. Son blatantly disobeyed what we told him not to do. But the more I thought about it, I had to be honest - at 15 years old, I didn't always do what my parents wanted me to do. If the worst thing he's doing is taking library items, we're not that bad off compared to what other parents are going through.) That Sunday, Son forgot to bring the game home. This might not have been such a problem, but the way that the placement schedule worked out, The Ex wasn't going to pick them up for another 3 weeks.
Son continued to forget about all of this until he got a late notice from the library in the mail. We asked where the game was. Son admitted it was at The Ex's, said he'd have to remember it the next time he went there.
Son came back from The Ex's and the very next day, got his second late notice indicating that the cost of the game was $54; if the game was not returned, it would need to be purchased because the library would have to replace what they were going to consider a lost item. Son says he forgot the game, it's at The Ex's parents' house, and asks if we can call them and ask them to mail it back. Husband says he will send The Ex a message about it.
Husband logs into 2houses and sends The Ex a message with the subject "[Name of game] XBox One game" (Keep that in mind because it's important later.) Husband said that Son took a library game that he thinks was left at The Ex's parents' house and it's been forgotten twice now, so Son is getting late notices for it. Husband asked if either The Ex or her parents could mail back the game; he also mentions that we're missing another library item and asks that if it's found at either her parents' house or at Ned's, if it could be mailed back with the game.
One hour and twenty-two minutes later:
"I'm sorry he brought games and or movies. (We stated that Son took one game and we're missing a movie. How does that translate to "games and or movies"?) Especially if there (*they're) library ones. (...it was very clearly stated that both missing items are library items. We have literally never once asked her to return something that we personally purchased for Son or Daughter because unlike her, when we purchase things for the kids to use we don't mind if it goes back and forth between houses.) I haven't seen him with anything here. (Probably because when Son took it with him, he didn't spend the weekend with you. Not to mention that we specifically stated that Son believes the game is at your parents' house.) I'll ask [The Ex's brother] and mom tomorrow about them. [Name of movie] is a movie? (This was our fault. We didn't explain that it was a movie because past experience has shown that too much information overloads her pea-sized brain.) And I'm assuming the game is a regular xbox or xbox one? (The subject of the message she is replying to is, "[Name of game] XBox One game" which we felt was self-explanatory. Instead, The Ex is assuming it "is a regular xbox or xbox one?" I don't even know what that means...is she stating her assumption or asking a question?) Or what kind of game is it? (.......she cannot be serious.)
I'll also ask if anyone is driving to [Hometown] anytime soon and you can meet them there (...I beg your pardon? Hometown is a 40+ minute one-way trip from our house; at what point did Husband ever volunteer to do this? All I can assume is this is her, once again, trying to control the situation so she's going to tell Husband how we can get these items back.)"
Husband replied ten minutes later saying he didn't know when he was going to Hometown next and it would be a lot faster for her to mail it back. He clarified the game was an XBox One game and the movie was a movie. Husband asked again for both items to be mailed back as soon as they were located.
The Ex read the message less than 24 hours after Husband sent it. The next day she called Daughter about it, saying they didn't know where the game was and talked about which items were/weren't overdue yet. The following day, which was three days after Husband first asked her to return the game:
"The game was found at moms. (Great. Thanks for paying attention when I told you where to find it.) I called the library by you and she suggested I hand it in to the library over here, and they would send it to [Our City]. (What's astounding to me is that she can never get any information about the kids' school activities or events on her own, so if she doesn't attend then it's Husband's fault. Yet she located the number for the library in Our City, called them, discussed both missing items, and was able to come to a resolution on how to get the game returned.) No one found [name of movie] movie."
Husband replied that if The Ex's library will return the game to our library, it's fine; he just wants it back ASAP because Son is getting charged for each day that it's late. The Ex read it and said nothing.
So yeah, really hoping that game shows up otherwise Son is going to owe the library $54. Thanks, Mommy.
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