Mommy Dearest
If I didn't know better, I'd swear that The Ex is starting to turn into Joan Crawford.
Earlier this week, Daughter told me that The Ex had gotten mad at her over the weekend. Daughter said that earlier in the morning, The Ex had let Daughter and her younger siblings go over to The Ex's parents' house. At some point, a family friend's daughter was being released from the hospital, so Daughter went with two of her aunts and the family friend to pick up the friend's daughter. Daughter said that The Ex got angry with her because she had gone to the hospital. Daughter said that The Ex always says she wants to spend time with the kids but when she and Son are there on the weekends, The Ex spends all of her time with Ned. I told Daughter I was confused as to why The Ex had gotten upset because even if Daughter had not gone to the hospital, she still would have been at The Ex's parents' house - not at Ned's.
Last night, I found out that The Ex was texting Daughter on Saturday afternoon. This is what she wrote, verbatim:
The Ex
Get the f*** home now
You did not ask me to go all the way to [hospital city] get home you have 35 minutes (Daughter doesn't have a license or a vehicle, so she can't really just take off and leave everyone else there. A 35-minute deadline is only possible if she was already in the car at the time you demanded she leave.)
Daughter
We are waiting for the discharge papers (The friend's daughter wasn't even out of the hospital yet, and The Ex is screaming at Daughter to get home.)
You were at work still (Daughter is explaining her decision to go to the hospital without asking The Ex if it was okay; The Ex was at work so she didn't think it would matter.)
U probably would of taken a nap if i came home anyway (Ohhhh, noooo. Daughter has no idea what she just did: she blamed a narcissist.)
The Ex
I don't care. It's been 5 weeks since I seen u. (On her last placement weekend, Husband asked if she wanted to switch weekends; she left Daughter here with us. That was 100% her choice and now she's trying to make Daughter feel bad about it.) U don't think I wanna spend time with u
Really (I think this was her response to Daughter saying that The Ex would have taken a nap when she got home.)
Fucking stay over there (....I really can't even comprehend how or why she thinks it's okay to talk to your child in this manner.)
Daughter
well ive told you this before you are with [Ned] and i never get time with u (If Daughter told me this, I would be so upset with myself that I had made my child feel as if she didn't matter to me. But, I am not a narcissist.)
The Ex
Stay there
Wait until I talk to dad about this.
Daughter
what???? (This was my reaction as well. Then it dawned on me: The Ex was not going to talk to Husband about it, she was going to talk to Ned about it and is referring to Ned as "dad.")
The Ex then called Daughter, and spent 30 seconds screaming at her:
Earlier this week, Daughter told me that The Ex had gotten mad at her over the weekend. Daughter said that earlier in the morning, The Ex had let Daughter and her younger siblings go over to The Ex's parents' house. At some point, a family friend's daughter was being released from the hospital, so Daughter went with two of her aunts and the family friend to pick up the friend's daughter. Daughter said that The Ex got angry with her because she had gone to the hospital. Daughter said that The Ex always says she wants to spend time with the kids but when she and Son are there on the weekends, The Ex spends all of her time with Ned. I told Daughter I was confused as to why The Ex had gotten upset because even if Daughter had not gone to the hospital, she still would have been at The Ex's parents' house - not at Ned's.
Last night, I found out that The Ex was texting Daughter on Saturday afternoon. This is what she wrote, verbatim:
The Ex
Get the f*** home now
You did not ask me to go all the way to [hospital city] get home you have 35 minutes (Daughter doesn't have a license or a vehicle, so she can't really just take off and leave everyone else there. A 35-minute deadline is only possible if she was already in the car at the time you demanded she leave.)
Daughter
We are waiting for the discharge papers (The friend's daughter wasn't even out of the hospital yet, and The Ex is screaming at Daughter to get home.)
You were at work still (Daughter is explaining her decision to go to the hospital without asking The Ex if it was okay; The Ex was at work so she didn't think it would matter.)
U probably would of taken a nap if i came home anyway (Ohhhh, noooo. Daughter has no idea what she just did: she blamed a narcissist.)
The Ex
I don't care. It's been 5 weeks since I seen u. (On her last placement weekend, Husband asked if she wanted to switch weekends; she left Daughter here with us. That was 100% her choice and now she's trying to make Daughter feel bad about it.) U don't think I wanna spend time with u
Really (I think this was her response to Daughter saying that The Ex would have taken a nap when she got home.)
Fucking stay over there (....I really can't even comprehend how or why she thinks it's okay to talk to your child in this manner.)
Daughter
well ive told you this before you are with [Ned] and i never get time with u (If Daughter told me this, I would be so upset with myself that I had made my child feel as if she didn't matter to me. But, I am not a narcissist.)
The Ex
Stay there
Wait until I talk to dad about this.
Daughter
what???? (This was my reaction as well. Then it dawned on me: The Ex was not going to talk to Husband about it, she was going to talk to Ned about it and is referring to Ned as "dad.")
The Ex then called Daughter, and spent 30 seconds screaming at her:
Daughter: Hello?
The Ex: [Daughter]!
Daughter: What?
Daughter: What?
The Ex: You say one more fucking thing to me, I'm gonna break your fucking phone when you get here! (So not only is she having a temper tantrum because she didn't get her way, now she's threatening to break a phone that she doesn't even pay for.)
Daughter: Well, you can-
Daughter: Well, you can-
The Ex: Do you hear me?!
Daughter: -tell that to Dad, why my phone's broken.
Daughter: -tell that to Dad, why my phone's broken.
The Ex: Oh, you sure fucking bet I will!
Daughter: Mom.
Daughter: Mom.
The Ex: And Dad is-
Daughter: Wait-
Daughter: Wait-
The Ex: -gonna fucking talk to you. (When she said "Dad" was going to talk to Daughter, she meant that Ned was going to talk to Daughter. Her weird family make-believe didn't work with Boyfriend; I don't know why she thinks it's going to work with Ned.)
Daughter: Mom!
Daughter: Mom!
The Ex: No!
Daughter: Listen to what I'm-
Daughter: Listen to what I'm-
The Ex: You're pissing me off! [The Ex's sisters] are over there-
Daughter: You know-
Daughter: You know-
The Ex: -putting shit in your fucking head! (I honestly don't know what, if anything, she thinks that either of her sisters told Daughter. My best guess is that she's trying to make it anyone's fault, except for hers, that Daughter didn't want to come back to Ned's house.)
Daughter: Did you know-
Daughter: Did you know-
The Ex: I'm tired of you and [Son] treating your mom like shit! (Where in the world does she think they learned it? She was a fabulous teacher.) You wanna treat me like shit, stay with your fucking father 'cause that's all he does! (The Ex then hung up on Daughter.)
In literally less than half of one minute, The Ex tried to shift blame onto her sisters, her children, and her first ex-husband who had absolutely nothing to do with any of this. Then to make things even more interesting, Ned texted Daughter:
You're (*your) mom just misses having time with you because she loves you, (She moved 2 hours away but she loves you, so it's okay for her to scream and curse at you.) dinner is at 5:30 enchiladas. (...what the hell?) I'm sorry if you think I take up too much of her time. (Daughter didn't say that. What she said was that The Ex complains she wants to see the kids, but when the kids are there, she's always spending time with Ned. That's not something that Ned needs to be sorry for; it's something that The Ex needs to deal with and discuss with her children.) I don't want to get in the way of your time with her, (Then go talk to your girlfriend about it.) being depressed about her divorce and finance situation make her tired alot. (DEPRESSED ABOUT HER DIVORCE?! She was bragging on Facebook less than forty-eight hours ago how excited she was that it was finalized, and telling everyone how she was celebrating! What the hell is this guy smoking if he honestly thinks that The Ex is even remotely depressed by her second divorce?! And just to be a catty bitch: it's "financial situation," not "finance situation." Dumb ass.) Anything I can do to help you two spend some time together just let me know. (I think Ned's heart was in the right place, and that he had good intentions in sending this text. The entire issue is that The Ex is the one who created the problem but refuses to take responsibility for it; now Ned is trying to ask Daughter how he can help her fix it so that The Ex won't be upset.)
I realize I'm not perfect and I make plenty of mistakes...but she is absolutely one of the worst mothers I have ever met in my life.
In literally less than half of one minute, The Ex tried to shift blame onto her sisters, her children, and her first ex-husband who had absolutely nothing to do with any of this. Then to make things even more interesting, Ned texted Daughter:
You're (*your) mom just misses having time with you because she loves you, (She moved 2 hours away but she loves you, so it's okay for her to scream and curse at you.) dinner is at 5:30 enchiladas. (...what the hell?) I'm sorry if you think I take up too much of her time. (Daughter didn't say that. What she said was that The Ex complains she wants to see the kids, but when the kids are there, she's always spending time with Ned. That's not something that Ned needs to be sorry for; it's something that The Ex needs to deal with and discuss with her children.) I don't want to get in the way of your time with her, (Then go talk to your girlfriend about it.) being depressed about her divorce and finance situation make her tired alot. (DEPRESSED ABOUT HER DIVORCE?! She was bragging on Facebook less than forty-eight hours ago how excited she was that it was finalized, and telling everyone how she was celebrating! What the hell is this guy smoking if he honestly thinks that The Ex is even remotely depressed by her second divorce?! And just to be a catty bitch: it's "financial situation," not "finance situation." Dumb ass.) Anything I can do to help you two spend some time together just let me know. (I think Ned's heart was in the right place, and that he had good intentions in sending this text. The entire issue is that The Ex is the one who created the problem but refuses to take responsibility for it; now Ned is trying to ask Daughter how he can help her fix it so that The Ex won't be upset.)
I realize I'm not perfect and I make plenty of mistakes...but she is absolutely one of the worst mothers I have ever met in my life.
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