If it walks like a duck....
I could have told you a long time ago that The Ex is only claiming that Son has depression because it draws more attention to her and she thinks it will convince the court to grant her placement. However, all of her actions prove that she's not actually concerned at all about Son; if he actually had depression, there's no way he'd be better off with her because she doesn't even pay attention to him right now.
A little over a week ago, Husband emailed The Ex saying that Son told us that she is telling him he is depressed and needs to be on medication. Husband said that Son is not exhibiting any signs of depression and gave specific examples of how/why; he also said that since The Ex had a concern, he would schedule a doctor's appointment for Son and let her know when it is so that she could attend if she would like.
It took The Ex four days to respond. (If you honestly thought your kid was depressed, wouldn't you be checking up on them a bit more frequently than once every four days?) She said:
"He is depressed. (Based on what, exactly?) Yes make an appointment. (I wasn't asking for your permission.) Please try and make the appointment on October 4th. If you can around 1pm. THANKS (Her reason for requesting this date and time was that mediation was originally scheduled on October 4th at 10am. She wants to come to the appointment, but only if she's already going to be in town.)
One of his reasons is he wants to be here with me. (He wants to live with his mom but doesn't, so that's why she's telling him he's depressed and needs to be medicated. Un-f*cking-believable.) You always have to make things complicated. (Years ago when the kids were saying they wanted to live with us, Husband tried to talk to The Ex about it. She refused to even discuss letting them live here and told Husband that if he wanted the kids he'd have to take her back to court and fight for them. A year later, we got evidence of the instability in her household; we went to court and won. Now Son is throwing a temper tantrum, and The Ex never once tried talking to Husband about any of this; she ran straight to court and alleged the Son is suicidal and in a gang so she wants the court to give her placement. But once again, it's all my husband's fault because he always makes things complicated.) His wish...is to stay with me and finish school here. (If he stayed with you, he would drop out. I guarantee it.) He's told me he's told you and you won't listen. Would you please listen to him."
Husband replied the same day, saying that he would see what the doctor had available on the date and time she requested. He repeated that Son is not showing any signs of depression and is doing well here. Husband said that he has listened to Son, and is doing what he believes to be in Son's best interests.
The following day, the mediator called and said that The Ex had agreed to reschedule mediation for October 12th at 2pm. I said that was fine and would work much better for Husband so that he wouldn't have to take the entire day off of work.
Three days after Husband said he'd see what the doctor had available on October 4th like The Ex had requested, she emailed again:
"Check to c if the 12th is available. We have to meet with the mediator that day. Either 11am or latest as possible that day. Thanks."
So there you have it, folks. She claims that Son is suffering from depression, yet she wants Husband to postpone any evaluation until it suits her schedule. Any parent who truly believed that their child had depression would take the necessary steps to deal with it immediately, not put it off just so that they would not have to make an extra trip to the doctor's office.
A little over a week ago, Husband emailed The Ex saying that Son told us that she is telling him he is depressed and needs to be on medication. Husband said that Son is not exhibiting any signs of depression and gave specific examples of how/why; he also said that since The Ex had a concern, he would schedule a doctor's appointment for Son and let her know when it is so that she could attend if she would like.
It took The Ex four days to respond. (If you honestly thought your kid was depressed, wouldn't you be checking up on them a bit more frequently than once every four days?) She said:
"He is depressed. (Based on what, exactly?) Yes make an appointment. (I wasn't asking for your permission.) Please try and make the appointment on October 4th. If you can around 1pm. THANKS (Her reason for requesting this date and time was that mediation was originally scheduled on October 4th at 10am. She wants to come to the appointment, but only if she's already going to be in town.)
One of his reasons is he wants to be here with me. (He wants to live with his mom but doesn't, so that's why she's telling him he's depressed and needs to be medicated. Un-f*cking-believable.) You always have to make things complicated. (Years ago when the kids were saying they wanted to live with us, Husband tried to talk to The Ex about it. She refused to even discuss letting them live here and told Husband that if he wanted the kids he'd have to take her back to court and fight for them. A year later, we got evidence of the instability in her household; we went to court and won. Now Son is throwing a temper tantrum, and The Ex never once tried talking to Husband about any of this; she ran straight to court and alleged the Son is suicidal and in a gang so she wants the court to give her placement. But once again, it's all my husband's fault because he always makes things complicated.) His wish...is to stay with me and finish school here. (If he stayed with you, he would drop out. I guarantee it.) He's told me he's told you and you won't listen. Would you please listen to him."
Husband replied the same day, saying that he would see what the doctor had available on the date and time she requested. He repeated that Son is not showing any signs of depression and is doing well here. Husband said that he has listened to Son, and is doing what he believes to be in Son's best interests.
The following day, the mediator called and said that The Ex had agreed to reschedule mediation for October 12th at 2pm. I said that was fine and would work much better for Husband so that he wouldn't have to take the entire day off of work.
Three days after Husband said he'd see what the doctor had available on October 4th like The Ex had requested, she emailed again:
"Check to c if the 12th is available. We have to meet with the mediator that day. Either 11am or latest as possible that day. Thanks."
So there you have it, folks. She claims that Son is suffering from depression, yet she wants Husband to postpone any evaluation until it suits her schedule. Any parent who truly believed that their child had depression would take the necessary steps to deal with it immediately, not put it off just so that they would not have to make an extra trip to the doctor's office.
I would have him evaluated as soon as possible, then she can't say you waited also. Unfortunately if kids cry wolf it can be taken any way except with common sense. Make the appointment without her, she can have him evaluated herself and I bet the diagnosis will be so wildly different that it will benefit you.
ReplyDeleteOh, we already have the appointment set up even earlier than she wanted; we are not rescheduling it out of convenience to her. This is supposed to be about what's best for Son, not what's easiest for The Ex.
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