Whoops.
While The Ex was on Vacation #4 this year, she shared something on Facebook that didn't really make a whole lot of sense. After some thinking it over, I think that I may have been the reason that she shared the post and captioned it the way that she had.
Before I get too far into this, let's go all the way back to 2011. We had made Facebook profiles for both Son and Daughter so they could add their friends. The Ex was claiming that she "couldn't" email Husband or respond to his emails because she "didn't have internet," so I wasn't worried about her spying on us using Facebook. I mean, if you can't get online then you can't see anything...right?
Wrong.
One day, The Ex popped up in the "People You May Know" section on Facebook. So...she created a Facebook profile without having internet?? Or a more logical explanation: The Ex was lying about having internet access just to avoid written communication with Husband. She had internet at home but she didn't want Husband to know that.
Before I get too far into this, let's go all the way back to 2011. We had made Facebook profiles for both Son and Daughter so they could add their friends. The Ex was claiming that she "couldn't" email Husband or respond to his emails because she "didn't have internet," so I wasn't worried about her spying on us using Facebook. I mean, if you can't get online then you can't see anything...right?
Wrong.
One day, The Ex popped up in the "People You May Know" section on Facebook. So...she created a Facebook profile without having internet?? Or a more logical explanation: The Ex was lying about having internet access just to avoid written communication with Husband. She had internet at home but she didn't want Husband to know that.
Shortly after The Ex created her Facebook profile, a few of my friends messaged me saying that The Ex had sent them friend requests; The Ex had never met these people, never spoken to them, never even laid eyes on them. The only natural conclusion I could reach was that The Ex had used either Son or Daughter's account, gone through both my and Husband's friend lists, and was sending friend requests to random people simply because they were associated with the two of us. I ended up deleting both of the kids from our friend lists until I could get our privacy settings locked down to a bare minimum; once it severely limited what you could see, I re-added both kids on both of our accounts.
So with all of that being said, The Ex and I currently have 20 mutual friends. Obviously, we're both friends with Son and Daughter. All three of The Ex's sisters and both of her parents have added me; I accepted simply to "watch" what was going on in their family, and I put them all on restricted so they can only see what I post publicly. Some of the mutuals are Girlfriend's family members, but not Girlfriend herself. (A long time ago, Girlfriend told me that The Ex had asked for her opinion on things; Girlfriend told her that she didn't like how The Ex treats Lucifer, she thought The Ex was acting selfish for expecting Ned to choose between her and his son, and that she thought it was pathetic that The Ex's kids treated Lucifer like shit just because she did and wanted them to do it also. Girlfriend said that The Ex unfriended her; I think she later said that she unfriended The Ex but either way, they are not friends. Oh, and make sure you remember that part about The Ex's kids and how they treat Lucifer, because it's relevant later in this post.) Now that both Son and Daughter are legal adults, I am much more relaxed about who I am friends with and what they can see.
Back in October, one of The Ex's and my mutual friends shared a post that read:
"Everyone says 'a baby needs their dad'. But no. It's not that easily put. A baby needs a SAFE dad. A PROVIDING dad. A CONSISTENT dad. A dad that understands his family is more important than KID SHIT. Call me what you want. But if I constantly have to be worried about my child's safety because their dad made the street life more important than his child, HE DOESN'T NEED HIS DAD. If my child's dad allowed his 'homies' to associate my child with street names, HE DOESN'T NEED HIS DAD. If my child's dad has not CONSTANTLY provided for my child but EXPECTS to see him on HIS time, HE DOESN'T NEED HIS DAD. It is important as a MOTHER, to save your child from any harm or toxic people. And yes, that even includes family members and parents. And I will protect my child at ANY cost. Because my child DESERVES a good life. And SHAME on anyone that puts a child's well being to the side for their PERSONAL 'feel good' moments."
So with all of that being said, The Ex and I currently have 20 mutual friends. Obviously, we're both friends with Son and Daughter. All three of The Ex's sisters and both of her parents have added me; I accepted simply to "watch" what was going on in their family, and I put them all on restricted so they can only see what I post publicly. Some of the mutuals are Girlfriend's family members, but not Girlfriend herself. (A long time ago, Girlfriend told me that The Ex had asked for her opinion on things; Girlfriend told her that she didn't like how The Ex treats Lucifer, she thought The Ex was acting selfish for expecting Ned to choose between her and his son, and that she thought it was pathetic that The Ex's kids treated Lucifer like shit just because she did and wanted them to do it also. Girlfriend said that The Ex unfriended her; I think she later said that she unfriended The Ex but either way, they are not friends. Oh, and make sure you remember that part about The Ex's kids and how they treat Lucifer, because it's relevant later in this post.) Now that both Son and Daughter are legal adults, I am much more relaxed about who I am friends with and what they can see.
Back in October, one of The Ex's and my mutual friends shared a post that read:
"Everyone says 'a baby needs their dad'. But no. It's not that easily put. A baby needs a SAFE dad. A PROVIDING dad. A CONSISTENT dad. A dad that understands his family is more important than KID SHIT. Call me what you want. But if I constantly have to be worried about my child's safety because their dad made the street life more important than his child, HE DOESN'T NEED HIS DAD. If my child's dad allowed his 'homies' to associate my child with street names, HE DOESN'T NEED HIS DAD. If my child's dad has not CONSTANTLY provided for my child but EXPECTS to see him on HIS time, HE DOESN'T NEED HIS DAD. It is important as a MOTHER, to save your child from any harm or toxic people. And yes, that even includes family members and parents. And I will protect my child at ANY cost. Because my child DESERVES a good life. And SHAME on anyone that puts a child's well being to the side for their PERSONAL 'feel good' moments."
During her vacation, The Ex shared this post and she added:
"I protect my kids 110% and more. My kids are my life...enough said. (1)If it's "more," then just say what the amount is. Don't say it's "110%" and then also say "and more" because you sound stupid. 2) I love that she wrote "enough said" but that was certainly not the end of her self-righteous diatribe. 3) Excuse me?? File this under, "Dafuq Did I Just Read?!" because in the near 15 years that I've had the displeasure of being associated with this woman, she has done nothing to protect any of her children.) I'm not just protecting them from physical harm, but so much emotional harm too. (I'm sorry, what?! To this very day, The Ex screws with Son's head. But she thinks she protects her kids from emotional harm??? She has done more emotional damage to more people than anyone else I have ever met in my entire life.) [The Ex's son] was getting hurt and bullied for almost a year and a half just about every day we had that kid over... but protecting him was my fault?... (I assume that The Ex is claiming that her son was being bullied by Lucifer. I don't know who else "that kid" could be referring to, or why "that kid" would have come over repeatedly for a year and a half.) Both younger kids see things and ask so many questions, that is why I keep them away from so many family members and when I explain things to the kids and ask what they would like to do, they choose also not to go... (Roughly ten years ago, The Ex's older sister wouldn't let her kids go over to The Ex's house because she didn't want them around Boyfriend; The Ex badmouthed her sister to everyone who would listen, including Son and Daughter. But now that The Ex is doing the exact same thing, it's perfectly acceptable because she "protects her kids 110% and more.") The kids see and learn things themselves. (And that's exactly why both Son and Daughter now tell people that their mother is crazy.) [The Ex's daughter] seen this 5 years ago... (The Ex left Boyfriend about 5 1/2 years ago. I'm assuming this is what she was referring to when she said that her daughter "seen" this.) I will always keep my kids safe (emoji of smiley face with hearts)"
I saw that The Ex posted this and my immediate reaction was anger. After the amount of bullshit that she has already and still continues to put both Son and Daughter through, how dare she sit there praising herself and how she "protects" her children. Not only that, but she rambles on and on about how much she protects her youngest two children without ever mentioning Son or Daughter. Like we're all just going to ignore that she lost custody of them because of her neglect? Like we're all just going to ignore that she fought tooth and nail to keep Son and Daughter with her and, by association, with Boyfriend - yet she was now saying what a detriment Boyfriend was and that she was "protecting" her children?! In my opinion, the post was a giant "Fuck you" to Son and Daughter. She'd spent their entire childhood chasing her own fantasies, neglecting them, exposing them to alcoholism and abuse, lying to them about Husband in her attempts to alienate them from him...but here she was preaching about how she "protects" her kids. She's just disgusting.
It took me a little while to cool down from this. Once I did, I tried to figure out how The Ex had read a post about a child not needing a bad parent, and somehow turned it into a rant about her protecting her kids, her son getting bullied presumably by Lucifer, and how her kids "choose" to distance themselves from family members. I just couldn't connect the two. But then a few days after her rant, I think I figured it out.
You see, The Ex had shared this post with her long-winded line of horseshit on a Thursday morning. On Wednesday evening, our same mutual friend had shared a post that read:
"I protect my kids 110% and more. My kids are my life...enough said. (1)If it's "more," then just say what the amount is. Don't say it's "110%" and then also say "and more" because you sound stupid. 2) I love that she wrote "enough said" but that was certainly not the end of her self-righteous diatribe. 3) Excuse me?? File this under, "Dafuq Did I Just Read?!" because in the near 15 years that I've had the displeasure of being associated with this woman, she has done nothing to protect any of her children.) I'm not just protecting them from physical harm, but so much emotional harm too. (I'm sorry, what?! To this very day, The Ex screws with Son's head. But she thinks she protects her kids from emotional harm??? She has done more emotional damage to more people than anyone else I have ever met in my entire life.) [The Ex's son] was getting hurt and bullied for almost a year and a half just about every day we had that kid over... but protecting him was my fault?... (I assume that The Ex is claiming that her son was being bullied by Lucifer. I don't know who else "that kid" could be referring to, or why "that kid" would have come over repeatedly for a year and a half.) Both younger kids see things and ask so many questions, that is why I keep them away from so many family members and when I explain things to the kids and ask what they would like to do, they choose also not to go... (Roughly ten years ago, The Ex's older sister wouldn't let her kids go over to The Ex's house because she didn't want them around Boyfriend; The Ex badmouthed her sister to everyone who would listen, including Son and Daughter. But now that The Ex is doing the exact same thing, it's perfectly acceptable because she "protects her kids 110% and more.") The kids see and learn things themselves. (And that's exactly why both Son and Daughter now tell people that their mother is crazy.) [The Ex's daughter] seen this 5 years ago... (The Ex left Boyfriend about 5 1/2 years ago. I'm assuming this is what she was referring to when she said that her daughter "seen" this.) I will always keep my kids safe (emoji of smiley face with hearts)"
I saw that The Ex posted this and my immediate reaction was anger. After the amount of bullshit that she has already and still continues to put both Son and Daughter through, how dare she sit there praising herself and how she "protects" her children. Not only that, but she rambles on and on about how much she protects her youngest two children without ever mentioning Son or Daughter. Like we're all just going to ignore that she lost custody of them because of her neglect? Like we're all just going to ignore that she fought tooth and nail to keep Son and Daughter with her and, by association, with Boyfriend - yet she was now saying what a detriment Boyfriend was and that she was "protecting" her children?! In my opinion, the post was a giant "Fuck you" to Son and Daughter. She'd spent their entire childhood chasing her own fantasies, neglecting them, exposing them to alcoholism and abuse, lying to them about Husband in her attempts to alienate them from him...but here she was preaching about how she "protects" her kids. She's just disgusting.
It took me a little while to cool down from this. Once I did, I tried to figure out how The Ex had read a post about a child not needing a bad parent, and somehow turned it into a rant about her protecting her kids, her son getting bullied presumably by Lucifer, and how her kids "choose" to distance themselves from family members. I just couldn't connect the two. But then a few days after her rant, I think I figured it out.
You see, The Ex had shared this post with her long-winded line of horseshit on a Thursday morning. On Wednesday evening, our same mutual friend had shared a post that read:
"If you're dating someone's baby daddy, make sure he does his part as a FATHER FIRST. All you girls are so quick to claim these shady ass Dudes and don't even encourage him to be a good father, ANY MAN who isn't loyal to his KIDS isn't loyal to ANYBODY (shrug emoji) (red 100 emoji)"
I saw this post and I commented:
"And if you come between someone and their kid(s) or expect them to choose between the two, then you're just as worthless as they are (hair flip emoji) (red 100 emoji)"
I saw this post and I commented:
"And if you come between someone and their kid(s) or expect them to choose between the two, then you're just as worthless as they are (hair flip emoji) (red 100 emoji)"
My best assumption at this point is that The Ex saw what I'd written and felt conviction about...well, everything. How she'd treated Lucifer, how she'd forced Ned to choose between her and his son, how she'd managed to run Lucifer out of Ned's life, etc. But in her typical narcissistic fashion, she absolutely refused to acknowledge that she'd done anything wrong. Oh, no. No no no no no. She had to DEFEND herself against these allegations! Her son was being bullied, so she had to protect him!! She will ALWAYS keep her kids safe!!!!!!
You know...just not from an alcoholic & abusive environment, or parental alienation, or leaving them home alone with a baby to take care of when they were both under the age of 9, or leaving them with drunk and/or stoned teenagers, or...
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