She's pure garbage.

  My last blog post was talking about Son's anxiety over Grandson's party and how he thought that The Ex was going to start a fight and cause a scene.  As it turns out, he had absolutely nothing to worry about.

  The Ex didn't come.

  Seriously.  She missed her own grandson's birthday party.  Before I get into the party itself, I'll go back a few days because there was a lot of tea that got spilled.  Buckle up, it's gonna be a bumpy ride.

  Girlfriend told me on Thursday that they were over at The Ex's and said that The Ex was running her mouth and being petty.  On Friday, she told me that The Ex claimed that Son told her that I was planning on rolling my eyes at her during the party "just to piss her off"; Son looked at her and said, "I have never once said that."  The Ex also told them that she bought presents to give to Granddaughter at the birthday party so that she could "look better than everyone."  Girlfriend then went on to say that The Ex told them that she might not even go to the party and that Ned "said she didn't have to."  Son told her that he still wanted her to come for him and for Grandson.

  Saturday morning, Daughter also announced that The Ex "might not come" to the party and said specifically that her reason for not coming was because I was going to be there.  I just shook my head and said whatever.  Daughter also said she was probably going to wear ripped jeans to the party and that The Ex was going to complain about that too.  I told Daughter we could really piss off The Ex if we dressed like twins; she laughed, and then I told her we were being petty and we needed to stop.

  Daughter and I drove up on Saturday to help decorate the hall.  Before we left our house, Girlfriend asked me if I'd go with her to pick up Grandson's cake; I said of course.  We got to Son & Girlfriend's apartment, and then Girlfriend and I took Granddaughter to the store with us.  While we were driving, Girlfriend again brought up that The Ex said she might not come to the party; I told her Daughter had brought it up this morning also.  Girlfriend said that The Ex was complaining about not just that Husband and I were going to be there, but she was upset that Husband's bio mom and stepdad were also coming. (They decided sporadically that they were going to visit from out-of-state.  We were fine with it and Son & Girlfriend were excited they could come to the party but apparently, we should have run the idea past The Ex before we okayed what goes on in our home without any affect on her at all...you know, just to make sure that she's okay with it.)

  Girlfriend said The Ex apparently also made a comment that she "didn't lose the weight she wanted to before the party."  Girlfriend asked me rhetorically who The Ex was trying to lose weight for.  Without even thinking about it I blurted out, "[Husband]" and immediately covered my mouth with my hand; Girlfriend started cracking up.  I apologized and told her that I shouldn't have said that; Girlfriend told me it was true.  Girlfriend went on to say that The Ex would complain about her weight but then if Ned tried to be helpful with The Ex's weight loss, she'd get pissed at him and accuse him of calling her fat and/or implying that she needed to lose weight, which he wasn't doing. (Daughter went to Tiny City for The Ex's birthday about 2 weeks ago.  She came home and said, "Mom's on a salad kick.  She bought like, 10 bags of it."  I thought it was odd but didn't give it much thought past that.  When Girlfriend told me that The Ex was trying to lose weight and didn't want to come to the party because she hadn't lost as much as she wanted to, it all began to make sense.  The Ex was on a "salad kick" because she knew Husband was going to be at the party; she wanted to lose weight before she saw him, it didn't happen, and now The Ex was upset.)

  Girlfriend also went on to say that The Ex had "promised" Ned's house to Son & Girlfriend because she's still pushing Ned to buy a bigger one with her; I said that The Ex can't really promise anything because it's not her house.  Girlfriend said Ned knew about this idea and he was okay with it; she said it was nice of them but she & Son didn't expect to be given anything.  Girlfriend said that The Ex had wanted them to sign only a 6-month lease when their lease expired last month; they chose to sign another 1-year lease and she was happy they did because now, The Ex is trying to get someone else to rent Ned's house.

  I told Girlfriend that Daughter had brought this up last year about The Ex wanting a bigger house and I told Girlfriend the same thing that I had told Daughter: buying a bigger house now, after two of your kids are grown and moved out, doesn't make any sense.  I said that I honestly think the only reason that The Ex is pushing to buy a house with Ned is because if/when she leaves him, she will get nothing because nothing is in her name.  However, if they sell Ned's house and buy a new one with both of their names on it, if/when they split up then half of it is automatically The Ex's.  Girlfriend said that Ned had The Ex sign a pre-nup very shortly before their wedding; she said, "He wasn't going to but at the last second, he was like, 'You've been married too many times already.'" (I honestly wonder if this is what led to The Ex getting so pissed that she stayed at a hotel by herself following the week of their marriage.  If she didn't sign the pre-nup, it would have been a huge red flag; if she signed the pre-nup and tried to leave, she'd get nothing.  Ned outsmarted her, she knew it, and she couldn't do a damn thing about it.)

  I told Girlfriend that if Ned truly did have The Ex sign a pre-nup, it completely made sense why she kept pushing to get a new house even though Ned didn't want to.  Girlfriend said she still didn't understand why The Ex was with Ned but at the same time, she did; Girlfriend said that Ned was not The Ex's type and he was way too nice for her, but financially it made sense that The Ex was staying with him.  Girlfriend said that Ned never came out and blamed The Ex for Lucifer not coming around anymore but said that The Ex was the one who "put him in the situation where he needed to choose." (So it was her that drove his son away.  This worthless cow made Ned choose between her and his own son....and the idiot chose her.)

  Girlfriend brought up again how The Ex said that she'd bought presents for Granddaughter in order to "look better than everyone" and said that The Ex had also made a comment that she and Ned had gotten the "best" present for Grandson and that they had "probably spent the most money out of everyone" on their gifts for him.

  Girlfriend also mentioned The Ex claiming that Husband had left her out-of-state with a new baby while he was chasing after a 16-year-old that he'd impregnated.  I told Girlfriend that story was such bullshit and broke down the many reasons why none of it made sense.  Apparently when The Ex told the story to Girlfriend, she said that Husband had left her and Son behind while he was running after a minor...but about 2 1/2 years ago, The Ex told Daughter that Husband had left her behind right after she'd given birth to Daughter.  I also told Girlfriend that Husband had never left The Ex out-of-state with anyone; they were living out-of-state together but Husband never left The Ex with his family and he never had a 16-year-old girlfriend.  I told Girlfriend this is a perfect example of what The Ex does: she takes one tiny bit of truth (The fact that they were living out-of-state) and then embellishes everything else around it(Husband's underage girlfriend, Husband abandoning The Ex with a baby, etc), but that one little piece of truth is in there just enough to make the story sound real.  Girlfriend said that The Ex insists that Son & Daughter have another sibling out there somewhere that Husband has never told them about.  I told Girlfriend that if Husband always supported and took care of Son and Daughter, why would he abandon another kid?  Girlfriend said, "Exactly.  And I told [Son], 'Look at your dad and look at your mom.  Your mom says that your dad was this piece of crap who never did anything for you, but look at him now - he does everything that he can for us.  Now look at your mom - she never did anything for you then, and she still won't do anything for us now.  So your mom is exactly the same, but your dad changed and suddenly became a wonderful person??  I don't think so.'"

  Girlfriend also brought up The Ex's weird relationship with Son and how it irritated her when The Ex refers to Son as "Daddy."  I mentioned how The Ex had been laying her hand on Son's upper thigh at last year's birthday party; Girlfriend said she remembered that and she thought it was disgusting.  Girlfriend also mentioned that The Ex had gotten mad at her two youngest kids last year because they were talking to me at the party.  I told her I didn't remember talking to them.  Girlfriend said she thought that I was helping blindfold the kids who were going to hit the pinata, so The Ex's kids came by me to get blindfolded; allegedly, the kids got yelled at for this.  Apparently they weren't supposed to even acknowledge my presence...or something.

  Girlfriend said that The Ex also said once that she had an abortion; she didn't say when or whose child it was, she only said she'd had an abortion.  Girlfriend said that the story went from an abortion to a miscarriage, which then went to eight miscarriages, which then went to twelve miscarriages.  I told Girlfriend that The Ex had a miscarriage when she and Husband were still together and that before The Ex had gotten pregnant with her younger daughter, she had told me that she had three miscarriages; about three years later, she told Husband that she'd just had another one; two years after that, she'd commented on someone's Facebook status saying that she'd had four miscarriages.  Who even knows what actually happened anymore...

  I told Girlfriend at some point that I could understand The Ex not wanting to see Husband because she blamed him for everything and they're divorced; what I didn't understand was why she hated me so badly that she didn't want to see me - what did I do to her?? Girlfriend said that The Ex hasn't claimed outright that I "stole her man" or broke up her marriage, but she has said that I'm "the reason that [The Ex & Husband] aren't together."   Girlfriend told me that the dates didn't add up so she knew it wasn't true.  I told Girlfriend that the first two times that The Ex had filed for divorce, she & Husband had gotten back together - once because Husband suggested it and once because The Ex suggested it.  The third time, The Ex told Husband that she wanted to get back together; Husband told her no and said he would still be there for his kids but he was done and no longer wanted to be married to her.  I told Girlfriend that when Husband told this to The Ex, he and I hadn't even met yet - but of course, it's easy for The Ex to fantasize and pretend that Husband would have come back to her if my evil self hadn't come into the picture, so that's going to be her version of "reality" and she's going to tell anyone who will listen that it's my fault.

  The morning of the party, we all drove up to Tiny City.  We helped finish decorating and cleaning up what needed to be done before everyone else started arriving.  Girlfriend's mom thanked me for all of my help before, during, and after the party; I told her there was no need to thank me because whatever I had done was just something that you do for your family.  When she heard about The Ex threatening not to come because Husband and I were going to be at the party, she told me, "[The Ex] needs to grow the hell up."  I told her she was correct but oh well, we can't do anything about that.

  Just before the party began, someone called Son; I'm assuming it was Ned.  I didn't hear what the caller said but heard Son say, "She's not coming?!"  We all knew that "she" was The Ex.  A few minutes later, The Ex's parents arrived; they ended up sitting next to us.  At some point The Ex's mom told Husband, "[The Ex] isn't coming.  She doesn't feel good.  [Ned] is coming to drop off the gifts." (Yeah, okay...so she magically knew on Thursday night that she "wouldn't feel good" on Sunday?  Because she was already saying on Thursday that she was thinking of not coming.  Give me a break.)  Shortly after this, I asked Girlfriend where Son was; she said he drove over to The Ex's to ask her to please come to the party.  I said he shouldn't have done that because it's exactly what The Ex wanted - she wanted all the attention on her and for Son to beg her to be present.  Girlfriend said she knew but Son was really upset when he found out that The Ex wasn't coming and said he'd started crying. (I really, really want to punch The Ex right in her stupid face.)

  Ned showed up a little bit later with their gifts for Grandson. (It was here I began to wonder why Ned was alone.  If The Ex hadn't come because she "didn't feel good," then why didn't Ned bring the kids with him to the party?)  He stayed outside for awhile talking to Daughter and Girlfriend, and then finally came inside.  Trying to be the bigger person, I asked him if he wanted to grab a chair and sit with us & The Ex's parents; he politely declined.  Whatever, I honestly have no feelings about the situation; I made the effort, he declined and it was probably the safest thing for him.  If he would have sat with us and it would have gotten back to The Ex, he never would have heard the end of how he "betrayed her" or some bullshit.

  Everyone had a really good time at the party.  Grandson took a nap on my lap, and I very obviously savored every little second with his adorable self.  Even Ned looked like he enjoyed himself...which he probably did, because his swine of a wife wasn't there nagging at him.

  When Grandson opened his toys, I paid attention to what The Ex & Ned had gotten for him because The Ex made such a fuss about it to Girlfriend.  They got him a metal water bottle/sippy cup, a mini Slinky Dog from Toy Story, a backpack....and a Toy Story toybox/organizer from WalMart (The shipping label was still on the box so I knew where The Ex bought it from.  It was $48.00 before tax.  The Ex raved about how she bought such an "expensive" gift...alllll forty-eight dollars of it.  She's such an idiot.)

  After the party ended,  Girlfriend said that Ned had told her and Daughter that The Ex had told him she wasn't coming because she "wasn't going to be the only person wearing a mask, sitting in a corner all alone, and be neglected."  I said, "'Neglected'?!  Absolutely nothing about this party was about her!  We were here for [Grandson]!!  What the hell is she talking about, being 'neglected'?!"

  Then Son told us that just as the party was starting, he'd gone over there to ask why The Ex wasn't coming.  He said The Ex was in the shower when he got there so he asked his sister why they were not at the party.  His sister told him that The Ex didn't want to go because Husband and I were there.  Son said fine, whatever; he asked his sister if she wanted to come to the party. (Again, going back to my thought: why didn't Ned bring the kids with him when he came?  My question was about to be answered.)  Son said his sister told him, "Yeah, I want to come.  But Mom told me that if I go, she's taking my phone away." (...The Ex literally threatened to punish her daughter if she chose to attend her nephew's birthday party.  I really try to stay away from this word, but The Ex is the complete definition of "cunt."  And as I've been typing this week, I remembered The Ex yelling at Daughter for "missing family events" and claiming that she was only doing it so that Husband "wouldn't take her phone away" and berating Daughter for "only caring about her phone."  Yet here was The Ex doing the exact bullshit to her child that she claimed Husband had done to Daughter.  I just cannot believe the evil that this woman exudes.)

  Son said that The Ex got out of the bathroom and he asked her why she wasn't coming to the party; The Ex claimed that Daughter "told her" that we'd all been talking shit about her on Saturday.  I immediately told Son, "No, [Daughter] didn't."  Son said he knew that Daughter didn't say that; he said he went on to tell The Ex that he wasn't going to beg her to come, but that he wanted her to be there for both him and for Grandson.  The Ex kept making excuses, saying she didn't want to see me or Husband, saying that she's "been going through a lot lately," and whatever else.  It didn't matter to her that her son was literally standing in front of her, telling her what he needed her to do for him - she wasn't going to do it.

  As we drove home, I repeated to Daughter what Son said about The Ex telling him that Daughter "told her" that we were talking shit.  Daughter sarcastically replied, "Yeah, okay.  I totally did that."  I pointed out the obvious: how/why would Daughter tell The Ex that we were "talking shit" when we were never talking shit? (I mean...Girlfriend and I were being a little gossipy when we were alone with each other, but it wasn't like there was a bashfest going on all day long between me, Son, Daughter and Girlfriend with The Ex being the topic of discussion.)  Daughter said, "Yeah, exactly.  And even if we were, I wouldn't tell her that.  I wanted her to come to the party; why would I tell her something like that?"  I told Daughter that I knew she never said anything; her mom was just making excuses and blaming everyone else.  Daughter said that The Ex was mad at her, too.  Daughter had driven over to The Ex's for a little bit on Saturday while we were decorating and then come back to the hall; for whatever reason, this upset The Ex that Daughter had come by "unannounced."  I told Daughter that The Ex was upset with her for coming by "unannounced" but if Daughter hadn't gone over, then she'd still be mad at her.  Daughter agreed and said, "I love her to death.  I do.  But sometimes, she just...ugh."

  The only people I feel bad for is Son and Daughter.  Grandson and Granddaughter are still too young to really know what's going on and/or be affected by it.  But my poor kids...I've said it before and I will say it a million times again: they do not deserve to have The Ex as a mother.