Baseball 2013
Husband emailed The Ex for two months about the kids getting to play baseball. In that timeframe, he sent The Ex fifteen emails; she sent him six emails in a timeframe of two weeks and then refused to respond to him after that. The kids wanted to play, so we let them play. When we got their schedules, we scanned and emailed them to her.
There were only a handful of practices; there were a lot of games (I can only imagine how pissed off she was for saying she'd bring them to their games. Again, this is why we keep this to email - now she can't deny saying it.) Husband sent The Ex an email in June asking what she'd like to do about getting the kids back; their order as it stood had him bringing them back to her Sunday at 5pm but Son had games Monday-Wednesday and Daughter had games on Monday and Tuesday. Husband said he could bring them back Sunday night but they would both have to be back on Monday by 5pm; otherwise he can bring both kids back on Wednesday night.
The Ex emails back and tells Husband to bring the kids back Sunday night, she will bring them on Monday. Says if she has to work late Sunday then she could see him not bringing them back. (I have no idea what this means or why she included it) Then she says that she wants a make-up day for Sunday (Why would you get a make-up day if they're coming home when you want them to come home?) Then she says that Husband should bring Daughter back to her on Tuesday, then bring Son back on Wednesday. (She is literally demanding that Husband drive 420 miles in a matter of 3 days. No.) Says they have plans Thursday so if they have practice, they're going to miss it and she "can not again change this date for what we are doing." (First of all, "cannot" is one word. Secondly, you haven't changed any dates; stop being such a martyr.) Says she'll talk to Husband at the game that night (It was Husband's visitation weekend and Son had a game at 6pm.)
Husband emails her back and says he doesn't understand her email. Asks about her work schedule (She finally got a part-time job after getting fired over a year ago). Says he doesn't understand why she would get a make-up day if he's following the schedule. Husband says it doesn't make sense to drive to New City three times in one week; if The Ex wants, he can bring Daughter back on Tuesday and she can pick up Son on Wednesday so transportation is shared equally. Otherwise, Husband will bring both kids back Wednesday night.
The Ex showed up at 6pm, an hour after the exchange time, and went and sat on the other side of the field with Boyfriend. We asked Daughter why they were late; she said, "We were waiting for [Boyfriend] to get out of work." (What you're seeing here is that The Ex wants Husband to stick to e-x-a-c-t-l-y what the schedule says; she wants Daughter home the following Tuesday and Son home the following Wednesday. But the exchange time of 5pm? Well, that's only an hour difference and it doesn't make sense for her to show up an hour early for Son's game. No no, she'll show up at 6pm because that works better for her)
The Ex comes over after the game, says her dad wants to know if he can pick up the kids the next day to take them to a water park. Husband says he doesn't know yet. The Ex says she'll let him know tomorrow if she can get off of work early on Monday to bring them to their games (After already demanding they come home on Sunday, now she's working Monday and doesn't know if she can get off in time to bring the kids back for their games) Husband says he waited at the house until 5pm. The Ex acts confused and says, "Didn't you get the email saying I was gonna just talk to you here?" Husband says yes, he got the email but exchange time is 5pm and Daughter should have been here at 5pm. The Ex stares at him and says nothing. Husband tells her he's going to be bringing back both kids on Wednesday, not one on Tuesday and one on Wednesday; says he's not going to do all that driving. The Ex replies, "So you know how I feel now." (I do not feel vindictive, bitter and stupid.) The Ex says she just drove up here twice this week; Husband says yes, this was a visitation weekend and she had to come up here anyway so it wasn't extra driving. The Ex says if the kids were playing by her, she "wouldn't have to be running everywhere." (Because taking your kids to their games is so burdensome) Husband says there's no difference between them driving back and forth. The Ex says, "No, but the thing is, I'd be closer. I wouldn't have to be driving an hour and a half here. And I would have a lot of help in [Hometown]." (There it is - her family would have been the ones driving the kids to their practices, not her. This is why she was pushing for them to play in Hometown, so that she wouldn't have the responsibility.) Husband told her it would have been closer when she lived in Hometown; The Ex now says that she's lived in New City longer than we lived in Our City (She wasn't even dating Boyfriend and never went to New City when Husband and I first started dating, when I found out I was pregnant or when he moved in with me. The Ex started dating Boyfriend a month before Baby Girl was born. She's either a)lying or b)so stupid she believes this to be a fact.)
Husband emails her later that night, says the coach came up to us and asked Son to play in a tournament that weekend; depending on how the games go for the weekend, he wasn't sure what time we'd be back to her house on Sunday. Husband also asked her to please let him know if she could get off early on Monday or not.
The Ex emails back on Saturday, now says we can keep the kids on Sunday as long as she gets a make-up day (Fine, whatever. You have to work and aren't going to be spending time with them anyway, but fine. We'll give you your one day.) The Ex says Husband can bring both kids home on Wednesday and give her a make-up day for Daughter not being there Tuesday, or he can bring Daughter on Tuesday and Son on Wednesday (Didn't we already go over this?) The Ex says because Husband went against the court agreement about sports sign up (How do you figure?), he's responsible for all the driving and her "time lost" (Kids are so inconvenient, I tell ya...) The Ex brings up again the kids playing in Hometown (Let it die already...); says she wishes they could have come to an agreement so they "both would have been able to drive equal distance" and she "would have had more chances to see the kids play." (You already told him you would have "had help" if the kids played in Hometown. You had no intention of going to their games and had no concerns with having transportation being "fair" - you just didn't want the responsibility of taking them yourself)
Husband emails her back, tells her again that she has the option to pick up one kid and he'll return the other; otherwise, he'll bring both kids back on Wednesday and is not giving her a make-up day. Husband says he didn't go against the order; The Ex said in an email she would bring the kids to their games (Bet you she is reaaaally kicking herself for that email.) Says they are already driving equal distances (She drops them off for a game, he takes them back after the game. Sounds pretty equal to me) Husband says he's sorry that when their kids play sports, she considers it to be "time lost." (Maybe misconstruing what she originally meant, but that's how it comes off nonetheless.) Husband asks again about her work schedule, which she still won't give to him; asks her to let him know before Wednesday when he brings the kids back.
The Ex doesn't reply until Wednesday (Honestly. She waits until the very last day.) Says Son is going to be babysitting her two kids while she's at work; if only Daughter is there, they're going over to someone's house and she gives us a number (This person is somehow related to Boyfriend. We are given no last name.) The Ex does not provide any information about her job, other than saying Son will be babysitting for a few hours at a time.
Husband asked the kids about babysitting while taking them back to The Ex's house that night. At first, they didn't want to say anything. When Husband said that The Ex had already told him they were babysitting, then they talked about it. Husband asked if they were comfortable doing this; Son said, "Not really. If [my little brother] is sleeping, then it's okay. But if he wakes up and gets hungry or is crying, I kind of don't know what to do." (I'll bet you right here and now that this was never even discussed with Son. The Ex probably just announced to him that he would be babysitting while she went to work.)
Husband emails back, thanks The Ex for getting back to him. Husband says he has some concerns about Son babysitting and would like her to answer some questions: what days and hours is she working/Son will be babysitting, and if there's an adult close by who can help Son if there is an emergency? The Ex does not email back. Husband emails her two weeks later, asking her to please answer his questions. The Ex still did not call back.
Then came the cancelled baseball game....
There were only a handful of practices; there were a lot of games (I can only imagine how pissed off she was for saying she'd bring them to their games. Again, this is why we keep this to email - now she can't deny saying it.) Husband sent The Ex an email in June asking what she'd like to do about getting the kids back; their order as it stood had him bringing them back to her Sunday at 5pm but Son had games Monday-Wednesday and Daughter had games on Monday and Tuesday. Husband said he could bring them back Sunday night but they would both have to be back on Monday by 5pm; otherwise he can bring both kids back on Wednesday night.
The Ex emails back and tells Husband to bring the kids back Sunday night, she will bring them on Monday. Says if she has to work late Sunday then she could see him not bringing them back. (I have no idea what this means or why she included it) Then she says that she wants a make-up day for Sunday (Why would you get a make-up day if they're coming home when you want them to come home?) Then she says that Husband should bring Daughter back to her on Tuesday, then bring Son back on Wednesday. (She is literally demanding that Husband drive 420 miles in a matter of 3 days. No.) Says they have plans Thursday so if they have practice, they're going to miss it and she "can not again change this date for what we are doing." (First of all, "cannot" is one word. Secondly, you haven't changed any dates; stop being such a martyr.) Says she'll talk to Husband at the game that night (It was Husband's visitation weekend and Son had a game at 6pm.)
Husband emails her back and says he doesn't understand her email. Asks about her work schedule (She finally got a part-time job after getting fired over a year ago). Says he doesn't understand why she would get a make-up day if he's following the schedule. Husband says it doesn't make sense to drive to New City three times in one week; if The Ex wants, he can bring Daughter back on Tuesday and she can pick up Son on Wednesday so transportation is shared equally. Otherwise, Husband will bring both kids back Wednesday night.
The Ex showed up at 6pm, an hour after the exchange time, and went and sat on the other side of the field with Boyfriend. We asked Daughter why they were late; she said, "We were waiting for [Boyfriend] to get out of work." (What you're seeing here is that The Ex wants Husband to stick to e-x-a-c-t-l-y what the schedule says; she wants Daughter home the following Tuesday and Son home the following Wednesday. But the exchange time of 5pm? Well, that's only an hour difference and it doesn't make sense for her to show up an hour early for Son's game. No no, she'll show up at 6pm because that works better for her)
The Ex comes over after the game, says her dad wants to know if he can pick up the kids the next day to take them to a water park. Husband says he doesn't know yet. The Ex says she'll let him know tomorrow if she can get off of work early on Monday to bring them to their games (After already demanding they come home on Sunday, now she's working Monday and doesn't know if she can get off in time to bring the kids back for their games) Husband says he waited at the house until 5pm. The Ex acts confused and says, "Didn't you get the email saying I was gonna just talk to you here?" Husband says yes, he got the email but exchange time is 5pm and Daughter should have been here at 5pm. The Ex stares at him and says nothing. Husband tells her he's going to be bringing back both kids on Wednesday, not one on Tuesday and one on Wednesday; says he's not going to do all that driving. The Ex replies, "So you know how I feel now." (I do not feel vindictive, bitter and stupid.) The Ex says she just drove up here twice this week; Husband says yes, this was a visitation weekend and she had to come up here anyway so it wasn't extra driving. The Ex says if the kids were playing by her, she "wouldn't have to be running everywhere." (Because taking your kids to their games is so burdensome) Husband says there's no difference between them driving back and forth. The Ex says, "No, but the thing is, I'd be closer. I wouldn't have to be driving an hour and a half here. And I would have a lot of help in [Hometown]." (There it is - her family would have been the ones driving the kids to their practices, not her. This is why she was pushing for them to play in Hometown, so that she wouldn't have the responsibility.) Husband told her it would have been closer when she lived in Hometown; The Ex now says that she's lived in New City longer than we lived in Our City (She wasn't even dating Boyfriend and never went to New City when Husband and I first started dating, when I found out I was pregnant or when he moved in with me. The Ex started dating Boyfriend a month before Baby Girl was born. She's either a)lying or b)so stupid she believes this to be a fact.)
Husband emails her later that night, says the coach came up to us and asked Son to play in a tournament that weekend; depending on how the games go for the weekend, he wasn't sure what time we'd be back to her house on Sunday. Husband also asked her to please let him know if she could get off early on Monday or not.
The Ex emails back on Saturday, now says we can keep the kids on Sunday as long as she gets a make-up day (Fine, whatever. You have to work and aren't going to be spending time with them anyway, but fine. We'll give you your one day.) The Ex says Husband can bring both kids home on Wednesday and give her a make-up day for Daughter not being there Tuesday, or he can bring Daughter on Tuesday and Son on Wednesday (Didn't we already go over this?) The Ex says because Husband went against the court agreement about sports sign up (How do you figure?), he's responsible for all the driving and her "time lost" (Kids are so inconvenient, I tell ya...) The Ex brings up again the kids playing in Hometown (Let it die already...); says she wishes they could have come to an agreement so they "both would have been able to drive equal distance" and she "would have had more chances to see the kids play." (You already told him you would have "had help" if the kids played in Hometown. You had no intention of going to their games and had no concerns with having transportation being "fair" - you just didn't want the responsibility of taking them yourself)
Husband emails her back, tells her again that she has the option to pick up one kid and he'll return the other; otherwise, he'll bring both kids back on Wednesday and is not giving her a make-up day. Husband says he didn't go against the order; The Ex said in an email she would bring the kids to their games (Bet you she is reaaaally kicking herself for that email.) Says they are already driving equal distances (She drops them off for a game, he takes them back after the game. Sounds pretty equal to me) Husband says he's sorry that when their kids play sports, she considers it to be "time lost." (Maybe misconstruing what she originally meant, but that's how it comes off nonetheless.) Husband asks again about her work schedule, which she still won't give to him; asks her to let him know before Wednesday when he brings the kids back.
The Ex doesn't reply until Wednesday (Honestly. She waits until the very last day.) Says Son is going to be babysitting her two kids while she's at work; if only Daughter is there, they're going over to someone's house and she gives us a number (This person is somehow related to Boyfriend. We are given no last name.) The Ex does not provide any information about her job, other than saying Son will be babysitting for a few hours at a time.
Husband asked the kids about babysitting while taking them back to The Ex's house that night. At first, they didn't want to say anything. When Husband said that The Ex had already told him they were babysitting, then they talked about it. Husband asked if they were comfortable doing this; Son said, "Not really. If [my little brother] is sleeping, then it's okay. But if he wakes up and gets hungry or is crying, I kind of don't know what to do." (I'll bet you right here and now that this was never even discussed with Son. The Ex probably just announced to him that he would be babysitting while she went to work.)
Husband emails back, thanks The Ex for getting back to him. Husband says he has some concerns about Son babysitting and would like her to answer some questions: what days and hours is she working/Son will be babysitting, and if there's an adult close by who can help Son if there is an emergency? The Ex does not email back. Husband emails her two weeks later, asking her to please answer his questions. The Ex still did not call back.
Then came the cancelled baseball game....
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