Summer starts

  One day at the end of April, Husband went to talk to The Ex when she came to pick up the kids.  He started telling her which weeks he wanted in the summer (Court order gave him two non-consecutive weeks of placement during the summer; order read that if that weekend fell on The Ex's weekend, they would switch.  Order said they had to let each other know which weeks they wanted no later than May 1st of each year.)  Husband started saying which week he wanted as his first week, when The Ex interrupted him and said, "I'm not switching with you.  You never switch with me." (We are in second grade now)  Husband says there's no switching, that the order gives him two full weeks in the summer and he was just letting her know which weeks he wanted.  After she left, he realized he never finished telling her which weeks he wanted, so he sent her a text message letting her know which weeks would be his.  The Ex didn't respond to the text, so Husband sent her a letter the following day and also sent a copy to the court.

  On May 4th, The Ex called Husband and said she just got his letter; she said that Husband would have to show her his phone and prove that he sent her a text because she had never gotten one.  Husband told her that even if she hadn't gotten the text, he had talked to her on the previous Friday about what weekends he wanted.  The Ex said Husband had only told her about one week, not the second week; then she said that the letter meant nothing because she got it after May 1st.  Husband told The Ex that he had talked to her in person, sent her a text message and mailed the letter - it didn't matter what day she received it on, he had told her which two weeks he wanted and he was allowed to have two summer weeks.

  A few weeks later, they were trying to make summer plans.  Husband told The Ex that his first week was in June so he would drop the kids off by her on June 13th.  The Ex said no; the kids were supposed to be dropped off on June 10th because it was her weekend.  Husband told her the court order required them to switch weekends, so he would bring them on the 13th.  The Ex said that Husband's letter "told her otherwise" (This is, word for word, what his letter said: "I would like for my first visitation week to be the week of June 5th through June 11th.  Per our agreement, we will switch visitation weekends and you will then have the children on the weekends of June 18th and June 25th, after which the schedule will return to normal and I will have visitation on the weekend of July 2nd."  Then when he repeats they're switching weekends, she says his letter told her otherwise.  I almost feel like she's being this stupid on purpose...) Husband then had to go into detail with The Ex, explaining who got the kids on which weekends and how the switching would work and how the holiday schedule would work.  The Ex began arguing that we had the kids the previous year for July 4th; when Husband said we did not have them, The Ex said, "Well, you're gonna have to prove it to me." (Exactly how do you "prove" you didn't have a child on a certain date?  What is wrong with this woman?) Then she launched into a whine-fest about how "this is what he did for Christmas" (Man, are we ever jerks.  The court sets a schedule and then we go and follow it, what the hell are we thinking?!)  Husband repeats we did not have the kids on the previous year for July 4th but even if we had, the current court order gave him one full week with the kids for the holiday.  The Ex then announces that week will count as Husband's second summer week (Nice try, but no.) and he doesn't get any more time in the summer.  Husband says no, July 4th is a holiday and that week does not count toward the regular schedule; he gets two summer weeks and that's that.

  The Ex then says that the father of one of Son's friends had called her and asked if Son could go camping with them; she wanted to know what to tell him (No, really - she wants Husband to tell her what she should do.)  Husband said it was up to her, but Son had gone camping with their family the year before and had a really great time.  The Ex ended up letting Son go with his friend (It was the right thing to do, and I'm grateful she let her son go and have fun.  However, keep this is mind because this exact same situation comes up in 2013.)

  That same weekend, Husband sent The Ex a text message saying that he wasn't sure if he had mentioned it earlier in the week, but Son wanted to play football so we were going to sign him up.  The Ex did not reply to this text message. (Right around this time, The Ex conveniently began saying that she "didn't text" even though we would get forward texts from her parents that had The Ex's number in the recipient list.)

  Father's Day rolled around, the kids were supposed to get dropped off at 9am.  The Ex's mom called at 9:03am and left a message saying they were in town having breakfast and the kids weren't done eating yet.  A few minutes later, The Ex called and said they would be over when the kids were finished.  Husband told The Ex that she was supposed to have the kids to our house by 9am, not eating breakfast with them.  The Ex told Husband to come and pick up the kids.  Husband told her that if she was going to drop them off late, he would return them late to make up for the lost time.  The Ex said, "No, you're not!  We'll be there when we're done eating!" (The kids were about 15 minutes late.  It's not that much of a difference but it's the principle of the thing.  When we only had the kids every other weekend, The Ex would drop them off anywhere from 15 minutes to 3 hours late; we couldn't take them back late because they had school the following day.  So no, this is our time with them - you will get them back 15 minutes late.)

 The Ex pulled into the driveway, the kids got out and The Ex left.  We asked the kids whose car they were in; the kids said it was The Ex's car. (It was 2011 and car that The Ex was driving was a 2011)  We asked if she had gotten rid of her minivan; the kids said no, she still had it. (So...she has two car payments now?!)  The kids said that the van used too much gas when The Ex went to work, so she bought a "work car." (To date, I think this is the most stupid reasoning The Ex has used.  Her argument is that the van used too much gas, so she needed something smaller and more fuel-efficient; she bought a brand-new car, which means she had to make payments.  Let's be generous and say it was only $300/month for this car payment - she was saving $300/month in gas by driving the car instead of the van?  Even if that were true, then she was just breaking even.  No no, this is simply what she told the kids to justify buying yet another thing for herself, while telling them that she had no money because she was forced to pay child support.)

  Just like Husband had told her earlier, we returned the kids late to make up for the lost time.  The Ex started trying to call him, left him a message saying the kids were "only 14 minutes late this morning" (Yes, after Husband told you that you'd get them back late. I'm sure if he hadn't said that, you would've shown up whenever it suited you) and now we were 17 minutes late (Now she's worried about being on time?  This is beyond laughable).  Then she says, "If you don't call me back in one minute, I'm calling the police." (I'll bet your mom used to say stuff like this.  "You've got one minute to get into bed, or I'll..."  Like I care about your one-minute window.  I've had to deal with and talk to so many cops because of The Ex and her behavior over the years that it doesn't come off as scary when she says that she's going to call them.)

  About a month later, The Ex's sister posted something on Facebook about The Ex going to the hospital and hoping that The Ex "and the baby were okay." (Omfg...is this a joke?  Please tell me it's a joke.)

  About a week and a half after we found out that maybe-possibly The Ex was pregnant, Baby Boy was born.  We were all excited, especially Baby Girl.  Everyone told us congrats and one of The Ex's sisters even posted on Facebook that we should have had the other two kids with us, and that Son was going to be so excited to meet his brother.  Husband tried calling The Ex so we could tell Son & Daughter about their brother; The Ex didn't answer and didn't call back even though Husband left her a message.  The next day, Husband called again to talk to the kids.  When he told them that their brother was born, Son said, "I know.  Mom told us." (...excuse me?  We didn't tell your mom that he was born.  And if she knew, why didn't she let us talk to you?  Oh, that's right - because we are not important)

  When Baby Boy was about two weeks old, The Ex called Husband and asked him if he would accept service by mail.  Husband told her anything that needed to be sent to him could be sent to Our Attorney.  The Ex said Attorney 3 wasn't sure if Husband was still using Our Attorney, so this was why they wanted to send it by mail.  Husband asked what they were trying to send; The Ex said she had filed to get her child support reduced because she wasn't working.  The Ex again asked if Husband would accept mail service; Husband told her that if the mailman came when we weren't home, he couldn't sign for the papers.  Husband then asked why The Ex wasn't working; she said she was on weight-lifting restrictions because she was pregnant (Something is wrong with this woman.  Seriously.  She doesn't take care of the three kids she has, so let's just pop out another one.  She's always going on about never having any money, so let's add another mouth to feed.  It's not like children are living, breathing human beings that need constant care and attention.  No, they're like fun accessories.  Let's just have as many as we can.)