It's All My Husband's Fault

   We had the contempt hearing yesterday.  Husband and I went together; The Ex showed up with her mom.  I audio recorded the entire thing because...well, you learn to document your entire life when you've blended families with a high-conflict personality.  Here's my transcript:   Commissioner:  Court calls "In re: the marriage of [The Ex with Boyfriend's last name] and [Husband].  Um...what name are you going by now?   The Ex:  [Ned's last name]. ( I was surpressing a giggle but would not have been able to hide my smile if it wasn't for my mask.  I found it so humorous that the commissioner had to ask what The Ex's last name was because she gets married to someone new every half hour. )   Commissioner:  [Ned's last name]? Okay.  Both parties are here in person, without counsel.  [Husband] filed a contempt motion, and I believe this is regarding some medical bills.  Is that right?   Husband:  Correc...

   We have court this afternoon.  Please say a prayer or two or five for both me and Husband.   For whatever reason, I am nervous about today.  My imagination has always been overactive and this is no exception.  Out of everything we've ever had to file since we fought for custody in 2009, Husband has only had one motion denied which I think is a pretty good track record.  I just keep playing out different scenarios in my head and I keep imagining everything going horribly wrong.  Personally, I don't see how it could go bad for us because I think that we've been extremely reasonable with The Ex for all of these years; she hasn't been following the court order, which is the one and only reason why we're going back to court.  Even though I can justify this in my own mind, that doesn't mean the court will agree with it; years ago, the judge decided that it wasn't The Ex's fault that she got fired from her job for "attendance issues" even though ...

   Husband picked up the envelope that The Ex had sent certified mail.  Inside was a check, which was written out for the exact amount of the bills listed in the affidavit - no additional interest and, of greater focus, no service fees.   The Ex wrote on the note line of the check: " Pay OFF of Kids Medical Expenses"   We're not cashing it.  Not right now, anyway.  Husband knew someone years ago that owned a car repair business; we'll call that person Guy A just for this blog post.  Guy A had done work for someone, who we'll call Guy B.  Guy A was going to let Guy B make payments on their bill.  Guy B made one payment and stopped.  Guy A was upset about not getting paid so he sued Guy B for the rest of the bill.  The court reviewed everything and found that Guy A had cashed a check from Guy B; Guy B had written "paid in full" or something similar to that on the note line of the check.  The court ruled that because Guy A ...

  I knew that The Ex was dragging Son into this court drama and was pretty sure she was dragging Daughter into it also.  Well, I got my confirmation.  I found out that The Ex had been texting Daughter the same exact day that she got served.  She was served at 12:50pm and started texting Daughter at 2:10pm.    The Ex:  I am so hurt right now by your dad and [my name, misspelled]. ( Here we go again with how "hurt" she is.  I'm honestly so incredibly tired of that word; she uses it for everything. )    Daughter:  Why? What happen?    The Ex:  All they are, are money hungry assholes ( We're "money-hungry assholes" because we expect The Ex to pay for half of  her  children's medical bills. )    The Ex:  Maybe its ( *it's ) a good idea your ( *you're ) not coming up for a while ( Here comes the narcissism - making Daughter feel guilty/responsible for the situation that The Ex created )   ...

   I feel like I've been telling you guys forever that we're going to take The Ex back to court for contempt.  That day has finally come.  A few weeks back I finalized the affidavit I'd already had drafted, Husband got it notarized, I printed all the receipts for the kids' medical bills, I printed multiple messages from 2houses showing that Husband not only provided the receipts but also multiple reminders, made copies of everything, drove to our county courthouse, and filed.   We'd been in contact with a process server company in our state but I figured for grins, I'd see what the sheriff in The Ex's county would charge for service.  I called their office and spoke to a lady who was very nice but not really giving me good answers.  She explained that their office "tries to avoid serving the person at their place of employment."  I told her that I don't know when The Ex would be home, but I did know what her work hours were so that was going to...

  While The Ex was on Vacation #4 this year, she shared something on Facebook that didn't really make a whole lot of sense.  After some thinking it over, I think that I may have been the reason that she shared the post and captioned it the way that she had.   Before I get too far into this, let's go all the way back to 2011.  We had made Facebook profiles for both Son and Daughter so they could add their friends.  The Ex was claiming that she "couldn't" email Husband or respond to his emails because she "didn't have internet," so I wasn't worried about her spying on us using Facebook.  I mean, if you can't get online then you can't see anything...right?   Wrong.   One day, The Ex popped up in the "People You May Know" section on Facebook.  So...she created a Facebook profile without having internet??  Or a more logical explanation: The Ex was lying about having internet access just to avoid written communication with Husband.  S...

Vacation 1   Back in June, The Ex had planned an out-of-state trip with Ned, her kids, and Daughter.  They were gone for at least 3-4 days; The Ex then told Daughter she didn't want her going out-of-state with us because she was "scared" that Daughter was going to catch COVID. Vacation 2   We had a graduation party for Daughter in August; I told her she could invite The Ex's family if she wanted to, which she did.  The Ex told her that they weren't coming because a)they were going whitewater rafting that weekend and b)there were too many people attending the party and that Daughter was going to catch COVID. Vacation 3   In September, The Ex and Ned had planned a weekend vacation for just the two of them; they were not bringing The Ex's kids or Lucifer. ( Lucifer is going to be the topic of my second post after this one; I'm going to highlight Vacation 4 in the next post. )  She told Daughter that she wanted her to drive herself up to Tiny City and watc...

  So sorry for the length of time in between posts!  It has been CRAZY busy around here in our work and personal lives; not a whole lot to report about The Ex but she's been busy over the last few weeks.   Son and Girlfriend had another baby about one month ago. ( We're grandparents again, yay!! )  They asked everyone to wait to post anything on social media because they wanted Grandson to meet his sister first before anyone posted about her.   Before I get into this next story, let me rewind to last year sometime.  Apparently, I forgot to tell you what happened last year while The Ex was watching Grandson.  Girlfriend told me that she was apprehensive about leaving him overnight but The Ex would not stop bugging them about it, so they caved and let him stay.  They gave The Ex specific instructions on what to do/not do with Grandson; one of those instructions was that Grandson had to be fed every 3 hours because Girlfriend was breastfeeding and th...

  We went to see Son and Girlfriend a few weekends ago.  Girlfriend brought up The Ex's younger son; both she and Son said that they were pissed off at the kid and said, for what seemed like the millionth time we've heard it from them, that The Ex's son is turning out to be a little brat.   Son said recently, they had gone over to The Ex and Ned's house.  Son had a practically brand new pack of cigarettes with him; he said he had maybe smoked only one or two out of the pack.  The Ex saw Son's cigarettes on the ground, told her son to go stomp on Son's cigarettes...and he did.  Son said he got angry because The Ex had just wasted his money; The Ex said she didn't care because "it's bad for him."  Girlfriend said it wasn't the first time this had happened; she said The Ex's son had intentionally stepped on another pack of their cigarettes without being prompted by The Ex to do so.   A few days after talking to Son and Girlfriend about thi...

  Daughter has commented multiple times this week to multiple people that she has not spoken to The Ex since our potential COVID exposure.  You know...when The Ex accused me again of having an affair, told Daughter that I was "lying through my fucking teeth" about it, alleged that Daughter was lying for me, hung up on Daughter, and refused to answer the phone when Daughter called her back.   I learned from Girlfriend that The Ex still held a party that weekend - the party that was supposed to be to celebrate Son, Daughter, and The Ex's daughter's birthdays and also celebrate Daughter's graduation.  Yes, The Ex still hosted that party without Daughter being present for it.  I talked to Girlfriend about what had happened between Daughter and The Ex; Girlfriend told me that during the party, The Ex had commented that "it was better to be safe than sorry" and told me that she didn't know what had changed between The Ex calling Daughter a liar and hangin...

  I got a text yesterday from a friend of ours, who had also attended the graduation with her husband and two daughters; she said that she and her oldest daughter had tested positive for COVID and we needed to be aware of any symptoms.  Not five minutes after my friend told me about her positive diagnosis, someone totally unrelated to them came into my work for two reasons; one was actually work-related and the other was to tell me about my friend's diagnosis so apparently, the news was already spreading around School City like wildfire.   I told Daughter and said she probably ought to tell The Ex about it because a)The Ex and Ned were both at graduation and b)Daughter is supposed to go to Tiny City this weekend for a group birthday/graduation party.  Daughter thought maybe we could just skip informing The Ex of everything but I pointed out that The Ex's parents were supposed to attend the party; The Ex's dad has had health issues for years, dating back to when Husba...

  Daughter had taken a screenshot of the email sent out by the school regarding the graduation ceremony and procedures, which included picking up your tickets at the school office; she sent the screenshot to The Ex.  The Ex replied that she didn't have any tickets.  Daughter told her that we had the tickets.  The Ex replied, "GREAT..."     The night of graduation, Daughter called The Ex for something.  Not entirely sure what.  Either way, The Ex had previously told Daughter that she was going to be done with work at 4pm.  Daughter called The Ex around 4:15-4:30pm; The Ex was still at work.  Daughter said that The Ex asked if we were all going to sit separately.  Daughter told her that we'd probably all be sitting together because we were all there for the same kid.  The Ex argued that the school shouldn't be sitting us together because we don't all live in the same household; The Ex then told Daughter to tell the school to...

  You guys.  Daughter is turning 18 tomorrow.  I have been waiting for this moment for years and it's almost hard to process that we literally will never have to speak to The Ex again unless we want to do so.  No more sharing schedules, no more delayed or cancelled plans because she can't make up her mind, no more arguing.  It is going to be absolutely glorious.  With all of that being said, The Ex is still up to her typical BS with everything and throwing Daughter smack dab in the middle of it.   We're planning a graduation party for Daughter in August.  Trying to be civil, I told Daughter that she could invite her mom's side of the family if she wanted them to come.  Daughter took it one step further and invited not only The Ex's family, but also The Ex and Ned. ( I cringed when I saw The Ex's name on the guest list because quite frankly, I don't want that evil spawn anywhere near my house.  But I suppose that if it's for Daughter and ...