Police report 2006

  Unknown to us, there were lots of things going on in The Ex's house.  She always had a problem with Husband and/or me, but we assumed it was just sour grapes.  Not getting along with your ex-spouse doesn't necessarily make a bad parent (Unless you're trying to turn the kids against the other person.  Then you suck as a parent)  We knew small things here and there - The Ex missed the kids' practices and/or games; The Ex would leave the kids with her parents for days while she was out with Boyfriend; The Ex was having her teen brother babysit since he dropped out of school and wasn't doing anything.  But it wasn't until after Husband had gotten the temporary order giving him physical custody of the kids that we realized just what a terrible parent The Ex had been.

  Since the case was still ongoing, we sent a request to the Hometown Police asking for copies of any cases involving The Ex.  We got copies of two reports; one we had heard about, the other we had not.

  The case from 2006 was one in which The Ex received a citation for providing alcohol to minors; we had thought that she just bought beer/alcohol for one of her siblings or cousins, who weren't old enough to buy it themselves.  It was much worse than that.

  According to the police report, a mother called saying that her child had come home drunk from The Ex's apartment.  The mother called The Ex's apartment and said she was calling the police; The Ex called them back and told them that if the police contacted them, they should lie.

  One of The Ex's aunts also spoke to the officer (Certain information is blacked out due to minors being involved; they black out names and references to gender.  Some of this is my guess as to who is doing the speaking but all of the events blogged about here are being quoted from the police report - no embellishments, no bending of the truth.  This is what The Ex did).  The aunt gave the officer permission to speak to her son/The Ex's cousin.  The Ex's cousin said that he had been asked to come over and babysit for The Ex while she had a Mary Kay party (The Ex was giving teenagers alcohol to drink in her apartment while Son and Daughter, ages 5 and 3, were home with her); her cousin said he saw The Ex give another minor a wine cooler.  The other person said they didn't want to drink any alcohol; The Ex told them to "go ahead and drink and not to waste it."  The cousin went on to say he had seen other minors drinking in The Ex's apartment at other times (So this was not an isolated incident.  The Ex was 24 years old with two kids, and was letting teenagers come to her place and get drunk)

  The cousin was asked what had happened after they had been told that the police were being contacted about the underage drinking; he said that The Ex told everyone they had to leave so they "would not be home when the police arrived."  The cousin said The Ex drove one of the minors home and told them "not to answer the door if the police come."  The cousin told The Ex he was not going to lie or ignore the police because he hadn't done anything wrong and didn't want to get into trouble.  The Ex then told him that he needed to come with her so he wasn't home.  The officer asked if the cousin got into a car with The Ex, because the officer had been told earlier that The Ex was "sloshed."  The cousin said yes, he knew it wasn't right but didn't want to be in the apartment when the cops showed up. (We already established that The Ex had asked her cousin to babysit - so where the hell were Son and Daughter during all of this?  Were they being driven around at 1am by their drunk mother?  Or were they left home alone in the middle of the night?  Either way, it's a horrible, horrible situation for them to be in) The cousin said he then came back to The Ex's apartment and listened to The Ex tell them not to talk to the police or tell the truth.  The Ex told them that if they told the police what was happening at her place, they would no longer be invited or welcomed.

  Later, another minor contacted the police and admitted they had earlier lied about what was going on at The Ex's apartment.  The officer asked why they had lied; the person said that they were scared and that The Ex had told them to lie.  The person stated that they had previously been drinking at The Ex's apartment and had witnessed other minors drinking at The Ex's apartment; they said they believed that The Ex had bought rum for one of the minors.

  The aunt, mentioned two paragraphs ago, re-contacted the police and said she spoke to The Ex's mom about this.  The Ex's mom said she "wasn't going to cooperate with the police and/or acknowledge the police if they arrived at their home so that [The Ex] would not get into anymore trouble." (Because not breaking the law in the first place makes WAY too much sense.  Instead, break the law and then just lie about it.)  The officer tried contacting The Ex's mom, who didn't answer.  The officer went back to The Ex's to give her a citation for giving intoxicants to an underage person; The Ex wouldn't answer the door, so the officer mailed it to her.

  The next day, The Ex's mom called the officer on his cell phone.  The officer told her he would be on duty at 7pm at the police station and he wanted to speak to her regarding the underage drinking going on at The Ex's apartment.

  This is my favorite part of this police report: "[The Ex's mom] became extremely upset and yelled into the phone at this officer 'I can't believe you are doing this to our family'"  The officer told The Ex's mom he wasn't doing anything "to their family" other than enforcing the law and if anyone was doing anything to their family, it was The Ex by giving alcohol to minors.  The Ex's mom hung up on him (The Ex is giving alcohol to teenagers without their parents' consent; her mom is angry at the police for it and hangs up on the investigating officer.  Ladies and gentlemen, the apple does not fall far from the tree.)